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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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Sparky makes his first signing Mark Hughes hasn’t wasted much time in strengthening Man City’s sketchy forward roster. Today he unveiled Jo, signed from CSKA Moscow for a “club record” undisclosed fee. In his Moscow days, Jo looked like a windswept crackhead, but he’s since had a haircut, which sucks, because there aren’t enough crackhead […]

Yes, he’s still on honeymoon… zzzzz W-Roo has been honeymooning in Vegas with Colleen for several years, seemingly, and he’s still out there, soaking up the sunshine, betting it all on red, and mingling with the stars. On Saturday night he hung out with NBA star LeBron James, at the Wynn hotel’s Blush nightlcub – […]

Two of the Prem big four debut their new on-the-road wear Liverpool and Chelsea have both officially unveiled their new away kits for the coming Premier League season. Liverpool’s, as sported by Stevie-G, is silver and bound to divide opinion – it puts us in mind of the Candy kits of the 1980s. Retro, but […]

Dunphy, Brady and co. emply the power of heated debate, when TV coverage of Germany’s semi final againt Turkey was interrupted by bad weather You know that RTE’s pundits could easily keep talking for a whole 90 minutes, if they had to – more, probably. But imagine having to sit through an hour-and-a-half of Lineker, […]

Pies’ cut-out-and-keep guide to Bolton’s £10m striker Name Johan Elmander Age 27 Nationality Swedish Club history Holmalunds, Orgryte, Feyenoord, Brondby, Toulouse, Bolton Wanderers (current) Position Centre-forward. Is he any good? He started two of Sweden’s group games at Euro 2008, albeit out of position, but I didn’t see enough of him to comment on his […]

More ridiculous rumours from Beckhamworld Rumour 1 Becks has stinky fish breath, due to the fact he takes fish oil tablets every day – he’s contracted as the face of Go3 Omega-3 supplements, and reportedly loves the energy the tablets give him. Yeah, because taking fish oil tablets gives you fish breath. Next… [Hollyscoop]

Three of the best videos to give you a flavour of Chelsea’s newest star 1. Deco and C-Ron play football tennis Do I have to have this show pony on my team? More below…

Barca stars flout bowling alley rules In which Xavi, Euro 2008’s Player of the Tournament, takes on Barca team-mate Lionel Messi at ten-pin football.

Jose wants Lamps and the Drog. Surely JT is the man he covets most? When British newspapers made up rumours about new Inter boss Jose Mourino wanting to poach Chelsea players, the two they concentrated on were F-Wank Lampard and The Drog. No mention of John Terry, strangely. Could Mourinho tempt JT away from Chelsea? […]

Chelsea sign Deco. Looks like Lamps is off to Inter then Today is Big Phil’s first official day as Chelsea boss. His first signing was Deco, Portugal’s Brazilian playmaker. Deco has signed from Barca on a two-year deal, for a fee of around £8m. The arrival of one of Big Phil’s most trusted players – […]

Jesus, don’t give Old Man Aragones the bumps again! More below…

German fans welcome home Herr Ballack and co. From this video, anyone would think that Germany had won the tournament – and from the way this ceremony looks, perhaps the organisers predicted as much. Fair play to the German fans for giving such a warm wilkommen home to their team, who came so close to […]

Our favourite things about Austria & Switzerland 1. The football (especially that played by the Spanish) For most teams, relentless attack was the best form of defence – that was great news for neutral fans. The few teams that attempted to grind out results in a negative fashion (Greece and Italy, for example) made no […]

Iceman, meet Madman More Shit Lookalikes

Who had a shocker at the Euros? 1. Luca Toni (Italy) Came into the tournament as one of the favourites to win the Golden Shoe; left the tournament without finding the net, despite having 12 shots on goal and even more chances. Perhaps he wasn’t fully fit, or merely jaded after a long season at […]

Which unsung stars added a nought to their value after good showings in Austria & Switzerland? 1. Orlando Engelaar (Holland) One of only two Dutch players to start all of Holland’s four games, the giant midfielder impressed with his strength, discipline and passing range. He’d make a good addition to any Premier League club. Where […]

Hleb, Flamini, Diarra and possibly Adebayor off to pastures new? Why do Arsenal’s best players want to leave? Here are a few reasons why… 1. A rigid wage structure Rightly or wrongly, Arsenal has a wage structure that it’s not prepared to mess with. In theory, that’s a good thing – if every other club […]

Take part in The Big Kick!

June 27th, 2008

With Euro 2008 reaching final fever pitch, why not take part in your own football game this Sunday? At 11.00am on Sunday 29th June dads and their kids all over the country will be grabbing a ball and kicking it around for a nationwide BIG KICK. Get involved wherever you are or come along to […]

The Fiendish Friday Quiz

June 27th, 2008

Pit your wits against our final Euro-themed quiz 1. Career path Servette, Tenerife, Hansa Rostock, Bayer Leverkusen, Borussia Mönchengladbach (current) 2. Multiple choice Before David Villa’s hat-trick against Russia, who was the last man to score a hat-trick in a European Championship finals? a) Michel Platini, b) Patrick Kluivert, c) Marco van Basten, d) Milan […]

Today’s hottest football gossip, brought to you by the number nine 1. Richard Dunne to Portsmouth Man City’s captain is in the final year of his contract, and Portsmouth are very keen to tempt the player to south, according to the Manchester Evening News. Dunne is currently on holiday but other reports suggest that he […]

Prem appoints youngest ever ref You know you’re getting old when policemen and doctors are younger than you. I thought I was safe with Premier League refes though. Not any more. The Prem has just appointed 25-year-old Stuart Attwell to its list of elite officials, making him the youngest ever top-flight ref in England. That […]

C-Ron off to Madrid, and now this: Fergie will be pleased The Sun goes crazy today over the news that Wayne Rooney was caught smoking a cigarette on his honeymoon in Vegas. Gosh! A drunk sub-editor fellow guest said of this shocking incident: “He (Rooney) is super-fit – you don’t expect to see him smoking. […]

Our favourite snaps from Germany’s dramatic win over the brave Turks More below…

Word to the BBC: ditch these two jokers now Uncle Motty has gone into a branch of Boots and chosen his glasses from the section marked “Plastic frames suitable for wacky children’s TV presenters”. Meanwhile, Lawro has clearly bought his reading glasses for £3.99 from a motorway petrol station. So they both need glasses? That […]