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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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Fail: Horror misses bad enough to make you gasp, own goals bad enough to make you WTF? out loud, crunching tackles high and ugly enough to make you wince and dives woeful enough to make you want to punch something.

Calamari all round!

Serbian winger cheats, karma bites

Variety is the spice of life

Newcastle striker builds on bad boy rep

Dulee Johnson suspended by AIK

Aka the ‘Pigeon Shit’ kit

Not good

Sunderland defender can expect a knock on his door

Always keep your eye on the ball, Steve

Help, he needs somebody

A touching moment in the Bundesliga

Mick McCarthy’s side bottom of Fair Play table

The story of the Bitch and the Ho. You couldn’t make it up

Beeb reports that incidents of football hooliganism involving young people have almost trebled in the past three years

It’s not Wiltshire

The Reds continue to plumb new depths

Sky toss it up again

Khalid Askri has a Rene Higuita moment and storms off

Dom signs on