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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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Kits & fashion

Kits & Fashion: New kits, old kits, shit kits, both new and classic football boots; Basically, if it’s football kit-related then it’ll be covered here.

Message to JT: It’s not 2005 and you’re not Thierry Henry

Are Kopites gobshites? No comment, your honour. Available from, priced $24. MORE TEES Burnley 1-0 Man Utd. You watched the game, now buy the T-shirt Giuseppe Rossi Judas T-shirt Top 10 footballers who revealed T-shirts with messages

That didn’t take long! Available now from Newstowear, priced just £9.99 As one of Pies’ Twitter followers just pointed out, there is one small problem with the shirt - they got the date wrong. D’oh! Anyone brave enough to send one of these to Fergie? I’d say he’s a Large these days.

Quote of the day goes to Nereida Gallardo, one of C-Ron’s most skanky famous ex-WAGs. Here she is talking about Ron’s favourite underwear, a red, elephant-trunk thong:

A couple of pics from Celtic’s friendly at Man City: Holy high-visibility jackets, Batman! That is one standout kit. There’s no danger of Celtic manager Tony Mowbray trotting out Fergie’s old “the players couldn’t see each other” excuse. Turning to the stuff that matters, City beat the Hoops 2-1, thanks to excellent goals by Gareth […]

I don’t know in what situation a black, grey and pink colour scheme qualifies as camouflage? In the crazy, mixed up world of Scottish football, apparently. Whether or not Puma’s new away kit for Partick becomes more popular than last season’s pink-and-grey hooped number(the fastest-selling shirt in the club’s history) remains to be seen. In […]

City’s new away kit: … versus United’s new away kit: Gotta say this is a comprehensive victory for City’s new away kit. Very classy, especially the grandad collar. United’s, however, looks exactly like what it is: an unimaginative Nike template. Yawn. Which one gets your vote? Man City’s away kit v Man Utd’s away kit: […]

They got the badge wrong… Aaah… what’s that?… Oh. Sorry. My mistake. Seriously though, it still looks weird to see a non-Premier League badge on a Newcastle kit. I’m sure I’ll get used to it though.

Simple, classy? Er, no… Click on the image to launch the gallery:

Rather than hire a sexy beauty queen to show off your new kit (as Linfield did), West Ham Utd turned to celeb fan Ray Winstone (aka Ray, 52, from Essex) to show off its new Umbro home kit (that or Matty Upson really piled on the pounds)… Ray told WHTV: “This is beautiful, it is […]

Juventus’s new home kit features black and white stripes, as usual. Juventus’s new away kit features, er, black and white stripes, albeit on a grey background. I thought the whole point about an away kit is that it’s supposed to be distinctly different from the home version? I know that Juventus’s home kit has white […]

Rene Adler and Tranquillo Barnetta show off Leverkusen’s new Adidas away kit, which boasts a white, yellow and red McDonald’s-style colour scheme. That wouldn’t normally be a good thing, but I think this kit gets away with it. Another pic below: Like the kit? Think it looks cheap and nasty? Vote below… Rate Bayer Leverkusen’s […]

Nick Love did a half-decent job directing the film adaptation of John King’s novel ‘The Football Factory’, but then Danny Dyer did a half-decent job of torpedoing the movie’s credibility. Now Love is making is own version of Alan Clarke’s classic 1988 BBC movie, which starred Gary Oldman as ‘top boy’ Clive ‘Bex’ Bissel. Clarke’s […]

The home kit is fine, the away kit is too clever by half… You might not be suprised to discover that FC Augsburg’s new kits are made by k-k-krazy German manufacturer Do You Football, who are also repsonsible for VfL Bochum’s mental ‘smudged’ kit. Yes, we get that Augsburg begins with the letter A. You […]

Before: After: Take one picture of Manuel Almunia conceding a goal. Open Photoshop, change the position of the ball (not a crucial detail, after all), change the kit, erase the hoarding sponsor, and – ta-dah! – you have one shiny, on-brand ad for Arsenal’s new goalkeeping kit. The truth? Screw the truth. ‘By the way, […]

Here’s Herr Ballack enjoying yesterday’s epic Federer v Roddick snooze at Wimbledon (16-14 in the final set? It should have been exciting, but it wasn’t). Can you spot the Chelsea midfielder? Clue: he’s the one wearing the eye-burningly horrific shirt. This is no great surprise: Ballack is German and a footballer. And I can’t think […]

Umbro kill it once again with this very simple, very retro kit, which brings back memories of this old chess-board number: Another pic below: Now that is a proper football kit. Excellent work, Umbro - being bought out by Nike has turned you into a decent kit manufacturer, it seems. Rate the kit: Rate Rangers new […]

Look at this piece of insania! It’s krazy with a k. It’s the work of a funky German company called Do You Football. That doesn’t even make sense. So this is what happens when Germans think outside the box. The smudges are some sort of reference to Bochum’s industrial heritage, I believe. Bochum was a big […]

Did Arsenal get Arshavin to replicate his famous goal celebration for a photo shoot for the Gunners’ new third kit, or is this just a very good bit of Photoshopping? Either way, Arsenal’s new third kit is rather smart, even if some Gooners have complained that it looks a bit too much like Tottenham’s classic […]

No doubt many Hull fans will prefer the thick stripes of last year’s home kit, but their new pinstriped home shirt - modelled here by Geovanni – takes me back to the mid-1980s, before the days of the Premiership and Sky Sports. It’s a happy place that smells of pies and Bovril. The away kit - modelled […]