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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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July 19th, 2006

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A word of warning to English clubs considering a bid for any of Juventus’s disgraced stars: Italian footballers don’t travel well. They’re pampered mamma’s boys who never stray too far from the comforts of home. A case in point: Gianluigi Buffon could cherry-pick a Premiership or Primera Liga club, but instead he wants to move […]

The future of Fernando Torres at Atletico Madrid remains unclear, sparking a lorryload of rumours about which big English/Italian club the coveted Spaniard may go to. The most likely scenario is a move to Old Trafford (to replace Real Madrid-bound Ruud van Nistelrooy), but then which club wouldn’t be keen on a player of Torres’s […]

UPAlbert Luque. Scored Newcastle’s equaliser – and a curling beauty it was, too – against Lillestrom, in the all-important Intertoto Cup. The Spaniard will probably revert to his old, glove-wearing self when the sunshine goes away. DOWNJuventus. Literally, to Serie B. The news of the Old Lady’s demise was fresh chum for the Premiership sharks. […]

The brilliant Stephen Colbert on why the USA won the World Cup – I’m sure some of our American friends actually use this logic to make themselves feel better. And why not.

I’ve got nothin’ but love for this Photoshopped spoof of The Life Aquatic. [Via Sporati]

I miss Saint and Greavsie. Btw, did you know that Saint and Greavsie is listed on IMDB? No, neither did I.

Well, Argyle fans, things certainly won’t be dull under new manager Ian Holloway. I’m an Argyle fan and I’m made up that he’s our new boss, ’cause he’s the most charismatic manager in the league, no contest. Hollers has already managed to wangle a pre-season friendly against Real Madrid. Blimey! The game takes place on […]

Of the 900-odd players at the World Cup, I can’t remember one with ginger hair – I mean properly ginger hair, not strawberry blonde like Australia’s Craig Moore. Where have all the gingers gone? Is there a secret Kick Gingers Out campaign to rid the beautiful game of our red-haired cousins? I miss the days […]

Yo Hammer, please don’t hurt ’em! I’d forgotten just how awesome MC Hammer’s magic trousers were. I’d like to see Gabor Kiraly, Crystal Palace’s tracksuit bottom-sporting keeper, wear a similar pair, just to freak out the opposition.

Great rumour spotted on the Popbitch message board – so it must be true (coughs nervously, hires expensive litigation lawyer etc.). Anyway, this scurrilous rumour lie alleges that Michael Owen texted the following message to his old mate Alan Shearer, as Shearer was sat in the BBC studio with his pundit’s hat on: The manager’s […]

It’s the fun new game for all the family – how many times can Zidane butt Materazzi before he’s sent off? Use your mouse to control the big French rammer and then click to execute a vicious, out-of-character butt. [Via AddictingClips] Btw, Zidane returned to Paris with his team-mates yesterday, to a hero’s welcome. Seems […]

World Cups always outstay their welcome, especially since the number of participating teams was upped to 32. The group stages are always great (three games in one day = nirvana), but after that the tournament fizzles out. Who really could be bothered to watch Germany v Portugal for FIFA’s coveted bronze medal? (Okay, I admit […]

The World Cup is football’s biggest shop window (God, I sound like Clive Tyldesley). If you play well, the big clubs come calling. We’ve seen some cracking individual performances in Germany this summer, but if you could sign just one player for your team, based on what you’ve seen at the 2006 World Cup, who […]

If the prosecutors in Italy’s football corruption trial have their way, Juventus faces a six-point penalty at the start of next season in Serie C (Italy’s third division) and the revocation of the Serie A championships it won in 2004/05 and 2005/06. Ouch. If Juve are demoted (it could happen), I couldn’t see its big […]