Transfers & Rumours

Transfer Rumours: Football is awash with gossip, hogwash, tittle tattle and rumours and we’ll dutifully round them all up here for you and assess them in our own wry, irreverent way.

  • Henry luvs Arsenal 4eva March 13th, 2007 Arsenal

    He may have made his stomach fall to bits by playing whilst injured, but contrary to reports, Thierry Henry insists that he hasn’t played his last game for Arsenal. The Gunners captain has said that he will stay with the club "for life". Henry, now out for the season after he buggered up his groin […]

  • Joey Barton arrested on suspicion of assault & criminal damage March 13th, 2007 Man City

    Joey Barton’s making headlines again, and again for the wrong reasons. The Man City midfielder/serial troublemaker has reportedly been arrested on suspicion of assault and criminal damage. Barton was questioned by police over an alleged argument with a taxi driver in Liverpool, that took place earlier this month. Merseyside Police confirmed that a 24-year-old Widnes […]

  • Mourinho escapes FA action after calling Mike Riley’s mum a “whore” March 12th, 2007 Chelsea

    Only Jose Mourinho could escape a fine after calling Mike Riley a "filho da puta" ("son of a whore") during yesterday’s FA Cup quarter-final tie against Tottenham. The Chelsea manager was caught by television cameras using the phrase towards the referee at half-time, but Riley did not mention any incident in his report and told […]

  • LIVE FA Cup semi-final draw March 12th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    They should really rename this the Premiership Cup, shouldn’t they? When is a non-Prem team going to reach the last four again, let alone the final? Anyway, this is how this season’s semi-final draw shapes up: Blackburn Rovers v Chelsea/Tottenham Watford v Middlesbrough/Man Utd Well, Chelsea/Spurs and Man Utd have been kept apart, which is […]

  • Wembley keys to be handed over on Friday? March 7th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Start rubbing your disbelieving eyeballs. There is some incredible news. Builders of Wembley Stadium, Multiplex, could hand over the keys to the new Wembley Stadium as early as Friday, according to BBC Sport. BBC Sports News Correspondent James Pearce says building work is almost complete and the FA Cup final is almost certain to be […]

  • West Sham to be investigated by the police March 6th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    West Ham United‘s season goes from bad to worse after it was revealed that the police are set to make investigations into the club. Before you start, it won’t be for criminal defending, but something rather more serious. From shambles to shameful, the Hammers season hit a new low on Sunday when large groups of […]

  • Stockport County keep ninth straight clean sheet, with Wolves’ fourth-choice goalkeeper March 5th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    In beating Swindon 3-0 at the weekend, Stockport County notched up a ninth consecutive victory. A very impressive run, but all the more impressive because in those nine games they have conceded no goals. Not one! Zip, nada, nicht, zilch, nil points etc. That’s a Football League record, so big congrats to everyone at the […]

  • Premiership stars support nurses pay campaign March 2nd, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    That’s not a headline I thought I’d ever write. As reported in the Guardian, several football stars have signed up to the Mayday for Nurses campaign and agreed to donate their wages for 13th May to help nurses in financial difficulty. Nigel Medicore Reo Coker, Paul Robinson, Ryan Giggs, Gary ‘shop steward’ Neville and Micah […]

  • LA Galaxy get the services of another Brit March 1st, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Rumour has it that Ipswich Town’s Darren Currie has secured a two-week trial with LA Galaxy, and should he stay, he’ll of course by playing with a certain Mr Beckham. Looking at this compilation video, the kid looks a bit good… You have already read 4 premium articles for free todayAccess immediately the premium content […]

  • Lampard didn’t get a smack from Adebayor March 1st, 2007 Arsenal

    Emmanuel ‘Evander Holyfield’ Adebayor apparently DIDN’T punch Frank ‘Looks a bit like KD Lang’ Lampard. Pity. After Arsene Wenger started spouting off and shouting "THE LINESMAN IS A BIG FAT LIAR!" to just about anyone who would listen, and then called for Fat Frank to come forward and save his striker. Lampard’s agent Steve Kutner […]

  • PM calls for cheaper tickets for footy fans February 28th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Bandwagon hopping anyone? Right this way… Tony Blair has joined in the ticket pricing debate and backed calls for Premiership clubs to lower their ticket prices to make sure fans can afford to attend matches. He said countless empty seats at top-flight grounds in recent years were a clear indication that prices needed to come […]

  • Big Bouncy News Ball: FA charges Arsenal and Chelsea over Carling Cup brawl, plus Eboue and Adebayor February 27th, 2007 Arsenal

    As expected, the FA have charged both Arsenal and Chelsea over this unsavoury brawl, which took place near the end of a drama-packed Carling Cup final. Arsenal’s Emmanuel Eboue (horrible little man) has been charged with violent conduct for striking Wayne Bridge (glass jaw). Emmanuel Adebayor (My Little Pony hair) has also been charged – […]

  • Guus Hiddink fined for not paying his taxes February 27th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Ladies and gents, we have a new Lester Piggott. Tax irregularities are now known as ‘doing a Guus Hiddink‘ now that the Russia football manager has been handed a six-month suspended sentence and fined £30,000 after being found guilty of tax evasion. The 60-year-old Dutchman was accused of evading more than £900,000 (bloody hell!) in […]

  • Obscene season ticket prices to be slashed? February 26th, 2007 Arsenal

    News reaches us that Premiership chairmen are going to be forced into cutting ‘obscene’ ticket prices because fans have just about had enough of being the victims of daylight robbery every weekend, and as a result, football has reached a tipping point. Two top-flight chairmen have expressed the same view, both of whom predict price […]

  • QPR hit with misconduct charge February 26th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Rather unsurprising news this, but QPR have been charged by the FA after the fracas against the China under 10’s Olympic side ended up with blood spillage and a smashed up jaw. QPR have been charged with misconduct after the friendly match against the Chinese side and assistant boss Richard Hill, who has been suspended […]

  • World Cup stars to manage Father Ted footy sides February 23rd, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Former Republic of Ireland strikers John Aldridge and Tony Cascarino have had their fair share of football honours. They’ve both competed at the highest level for club and country, starring in World Cups and FA Cup finals, but for the former hitmen, their biggest challenge is to come. Cascarino and Aldridge are to vie for […]

  • Gazza to star in horror flick February 22nd, 2007 Newcastle Utd

    Gazza, G8, Paul Gascoigne… whatever you call him these days… has apparently agreed to appear in and turn his hand to producing new movie Final Run. Gazza will make his big-screen debut as a survivor of an alien invasion alongside the oh so very lovely Lois Winstone (daughter of Ray). According to production company SjB […]

  • Man City in takeover talks February 22nd, 2007 Man City

    Manchester City have announced that they are in "preliminary discussions" with potential investors that may lead to an offer for the club. The Citizens have revealed that, before Christmas, they were seeking fresh investment in the club but today’s acknowledgement that they are talking to "third parties" suggests that a bit of headway is being […]

  • Phil Dowd, definitely not on Paul Jewell’s Xmas card list February 21st, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Just leave it Paul, he’s not worth it… Wigan Athletic manager Paul Jewell has claimed, in the Daily Mail, that a Premiership club asked not to have referee Phil Dowd in charge of their games: ‘We can’t as a club say we don’t want him but I know a certain club that has asked,’ he […]

  • Benitez fines squad February 20th, 2007 Liverpool

    With some people saying "It’s all lies. I’d be more ashamed to believe it than anything. If you could conjure up an eyewitness report or a police record, that’d be great" about the Craig Bellamy story on these very pages, it’s worth pointing out that today, Rafa Benitez is set to hand out the punishment […]

  • The Guardian loves Pies February 20th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Pop the champers kiddies because someone likes Pies. No, we’re not talking about Wigan folk, but esteemed news rag, The Guardian. The Guardian’s Guide supplement at the weekend referred to WhoAteAllThePies as "Pie ingredients include news, fiendish quizzes, strange football kits and jokes about ex-Liverpool players/loafers." Can’t grumble at that can you? Of course, you […]

  • Adrian Chiles and co get sent poo in the post February 19th, 2007 Transfers & Rumours

    Match of the Day 2 presenter Adrian Chiles has confirmed that he is one of a number of BBC employers who have been sent soiled toilet paper in the post. According to The Sun, ‘police are investigating a string of packages posted to some of broadcasting’s best-known names since mid-January.’ Baggies fan Chiles said "I’ve […]

  • Did Craig Bellamy attack Riise with a golf club? February 19th, 2007 Liverpool

    Is Craig Bellamy the dimmest man on the face of the earth? His move to Liverpool was a slightly risky one on Rafa’s part, but we can all presume that he thought Bellamy may pull his finger out and keep his head down as his stint at Liverpool would probably be his last chance to […]

  • FA Cup Quarter Final Draw February 19th, 2007 Arsenal

    So the Quarter Final draw has been made for the FA Cup and the big guns have been kept apart once more. Middlesbrough or West Brom v Manchester United or Reading Arsenal or Blackburn v Manchester City Chelsea v Tottenham Plymouth v Watford The matches will take place on 10 and 11 March. Who do […]

  • Emre in race row again February 16th, 2007 Bolton Wanderers

    The FA are to launch a second investigation into claims that Newcastle midfielder Emre used racist language. A newspaper report today alleged the  Turkey international, who has already been charged by the FA with using racially-aggravated language during the defeat at Everton on December 30, made a comment to Bolton striker El-Hadji Diouf during a […]