‘Michael Owen As Lead Co-Commentator’ – BT Sport Football Coverage Sounds Like A Bloody Nightmare!

By Chris Wright


BT Sport are throwing their launch party as we speak and, Christ Almighty, the tidbits being leaked by journos on Twitter vis-a-vis their football coverage is  already making it sound like some sort of hellish nightmare. If you had to pick your worst possible panel, you probably couldn’t do much worse than BT themselves.

Before the live action starts (BT have secured the rights to 38 live Premier League games for 2013/14), viewers will start the morning in the company of the entirely self-absorbed shitsponge that is Tim Lovejoy, who will present a”fresh and innovative Saturday morning sports show”.

So…that’ll be a Soccer AM knock-off then, yeah? How very fresh and innovative.

(While we’re on the subject of Lovejoy, this never gets old)

Bland ex-Bamzooki and F1 anchor Jake Humphreys will be the main man (the omnipresent Claire Balding is also on board in some capacity), with pundit places for Owen Hargreaves, David James and Steve McManamanamanamnanman.


Ian Darke and the actually excellent Darren Fletcher are signed up as the two main commentators, while referee Mike Halsey will also be popping into the studio once in a while to provide an “officials point of view”.

And here it is. The smelliest nugget in this big barrel of festering crap kernels: it’s been confirmed that Michael Owen is going to be the channel’s “lead co-commentator”.

No. Thank. You. The man is a dullard par excellence. The man talks in binary for crying out loud! That said, there’s a certain wry irony in having a colour commentator who drains all the hue from the world each and every time he opens his mouth.

All this for £15 a month.

It sounds like one, giant, ill-conceived clusterf**k to us. In fact, it sounds like ITV Digital all over again.

We’ll pass.

Posted in FAIL, Media, Newsnow

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  1. A.Ferguson says:

    ‘BT Sport’ – this is probably the only thing that sounds more boring than hearing Michael “i won the balon dor once but i’d rather be involved with horse racing than football except for pay day” Owen talk…… I can’t wait for what quality insights / pointing out the obvious he’s going to give us.

  2. Russ says:

    Nothing is worse that Townsend

  3. JoeT says:

    Owen Hargreaves, David James and Steve McManama. “Cant wait!” said no one ever

  4. I. P. Freely says:

    The fake Tim Lovejoy column on the sadly defunct The Gaffer site was rib-ticklingly funny cos it simply reflected what the vacuous twat would have written.

    e.g. his all time best team in the world selection contained about ten of the then current Chelsea team.

  5. tipo 00 says:

    @chris. could you change ‘tidbits’ to ‘titbits’ please? i do believe i read something (maybe on the bbc) that americans changed it to tid because they’re scared of rude words, and as we all know, tits are what ladies have for gentlemen to play with.

    how tim lovejoy ever got on telly i have no idea. what a cretin.

    this may be of some relevance too. interesting. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-22462525

  6. Notorious.M.O.B says:

    Get your tally charts out for how many times Owen is going to use the word ‘phenomenal’. The man has about three adjectives in his locker.

  7. muppets says:

    Let’s not forget rio ferdinand – the man with the IQ of broad bean and the with the complete inability to form a sentence – is also on board.

    Although, as Russ points out, nothing is worse than the townsend-tyldesly axis of utter mindless, ill-informed bollocks.

    I think the mute button is the correct answer.

  8. porcelain sandwich says:

    God damnit. I, in my tipsy state, thought you meant Reverend Timothy Lovejoy from the Simpsons. I would pay close to £100 a month for that.

  9. […] video on Pies, but we reckon that it just might be the showreel that landed Michael Owen the gig as lead co-commentator for BT Sports next […]

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