Snapshot: New York City FC Hand Out Cringe-Worthy Song Cheat Sheets To Fans…

By Chris Wright

As spotted by the fine folk over at Bleacher Report, New York City FC have been handing out chant cheat sheets in a bid to ramp up the atmosphere at the McDonald’s Chicken Nuggets Stadium.

There are some absolute bangers on here (in both English and Spanish), including timeless NYCFC anthems “I Wanna Diskerud All Night” and “N…. Y…. C…. ***Clap****”


This little ditty deserves a bit of special attention too…


Crikey Moses. The last person we heard use the word “crud” was a bloke called Michaelangelo, and he was a Teenage Mutant Hero Turtle, in 1989.

We know that it’s easy to point and laugh at the daft Yanks getting it a little bit wrong all the time, but… – well, that’s that thought finished really.

(Via Bleacher Report UK)

Posted in FAIL, Funnies, MLS, Newsnow

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  1. Ron says:

    Goddamn, this is pathetic. NYC is already shitty enough because most of the fucks are transplants looking to make it big in “the city.” They then proceed to believe all of New York State cares about what happens in Manhattan and Brooklyn. It so fucking full of sad phonies with no substance.

    Now you take a derivative team, give them some fake history and culture, and tell people what to sing. Already taking a sport that 90% of Americans don’t give a fuck about, and make it worse by concocting emotion and history.

    Fuck off marketing and MBA assholes.

  2. Murray says:

    At first, I was curious in a new pro club in my own backyard, but between the terrible handling of the Frank Lampard’s ownership issue and the corporate molding of a supposed “fan culture”, I’ve lost interest a long time ago.

    Also, Chris, I understand you’re as proudly ignorant as us stupid, silly Americans, but even your own blog has reported that NYCFC is playing home games at the famous Yankee Stadium–not McDonald’s Chicken Nugget Stadium, as you so carelessly call it.

  3. Murray says:

    “Y’all”?!? You think I’m in Texas, MATE?

  4. UrinalCakes says:

    It’s pretty common for new supporter groups with a new team to have song sheets produced for the supporters. The song sheets were produced by the supporters group, not any club officials.
    A quick internet search would have revealed this, but it’s so much easier to react than it is to think.

  5. Savage says:

    Oh god…so half the fans are singing in English, the other half spanish? Also how can nycfc sing a song about teams not winning a cup when they existed for less then half a year? Pretty embarrassing…but that’s what happens when a country that hates the sport tries so hard to throw money at a team no one really cares about. Soccer. Americas sport of the future since 1972

  6. What4 says:

    The funniest part must be “Songs not included on this list may still be sung during the game”.

  7. Steven says:

    There is an actual movement of people who are knowledgeable about the sport and want to grow it, but it’s far smaller than MLS would want you to believe. Attendance numbers are useless because 75% of the crowd know nothing about the sport. They simply want to be part of the next big thing.

    This whole manufactured song and culture thing, though, misses the mark by a mile.

  8. Steven says:

    What’s worse is that they’re inevitably going to sing that “history” song against a club who has won a title.

  9. Fnarf says:

    This is very useful, as I always clap on the wrong beat, and needed some guidance. “After the C, after the C”, I mutter to myself.

  10. Interista says:

    As an American, I can only feel shame after seeing this…
    The MLS “fan experience” is dog-shit to begin with, but this is taking it to a whole new level.

  11. Stringer says:

    The other MLS club in New York.. I mean New Jersey needs to tread carefully when pointing the plastic finger. Truth be told go see the Cosmos play, they have history, their tickets are inexpensive, and Raul is there.

  12. Dieter says:

    “song sheets were produced by the supporters group, not any club officials”

    That’s the problem – the “supporters” of the NYCFC are club officials. The group was created, guided and designed by the club. There’s nothing organic or independent about what’s going on in NYC for MLS. MLS has seen the immediate future lies in the SGs and not the soccer moms or passing soccer fans, of which the US has been unable to truly cultivate. So it’s inevitable that the clubs and various FOs will try to co-opt the existing SGs (those they haven’t already) and begin to brand their own going forward, like the manufactured NYCFC.

  13. gamblino says:

    They forgot the traditional and inaccurate ode to Frank Lampard.. “You fat bastard, you fat bastard”.

    Although they have probably covered it with the especially damning footnote “***songs not included on this list may still be sung during the game***”!

  14. Geraldo says:

    Another notable absence is “City are a massive club”…

  15. Jarren says:

    “Come on New York score a goal it’s really very simple, put the ball into the net & we’ll go really mental”

    Sounds like it was written by a think thank at 1.30pm on a Tuesday afternoon in Starbucks.

  16. Jarren says:

    What is a think thank, you say?

    Answers on a postcard to “Jarren Can’t Type For Shit, Fucking Typo House, The Internet”

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