Paul Gascoigne – The Raoul Moat Radio Interview, A Surreal Extract

Ollie Irish

10th, July 2010

54 Comments

By Ollie Irish

What doesn’t kill you makes you stranger – so said Heath Ledger’s Joker. And there’s nowt stranger than Paul Gascoigne, who seems to unravel a little more each time he hits the headlines. How long before he’s down to his very last marble?

Here’s an extract of Gazza’s surreal interview on Real Radio, in which he attempts to play the negotiator, but with terrible, embarrassing results (Transcript via the excellent Sabotage Times).

Host: “Hello Paul!”

Paul Gascoigne: “Hello!”

Host: “Good evening – you are live on Real Radio. I just wonder… Tell us about Raoul Moat. The Raoul Moat that you know.”

PG: “Raoul Moat, er Raoul, I knew him years ago. He used to be a bouncer in Newcastle. I knew him a lot of years since I was a young kid, when I played for Newcastle [United]. He was like a gentleman – someone must have wound him up or done summat, right. And all of a sudden I just listened to the radio right, I mean on TV news. Obviously he’s killed someone and he’s shot two. Right?”

Host: “Well…”

PG: “…Doesn’t matter. He’s killed someone. Which is not nice, really. Obviously he must have been on drugs, um, and he’s shot two people, right. Now I’ve heard on the news that obviously the drugs must have worn off. Now he’s willing to give in. Right?”

Host: “I think we have to point out that…”

PG: “…No, please, get a hold of me, no, hear me out… He’s a lovely bloke – I know that – so at the end of the day I think he’s frightened in case, um, he’s put his gun down, I know for a fact he will… He put his gun down but I think he’s scared in case the police shoot him and kill him. The drugs have worn off. All he wants to do is surrender. And at the end of the day when you shoot someone, I think, and er, shoot, kill someone and shoot two others… You may get, what? Twelve days, twelve years, twelve…”

Host: “Paul, Paul, Paul… Well we don’t know about that exactly. But just tell us, what would you say…”

PG: “Twelve years, could be about six years and he’s out. He’s a good lad.”

Host: “If he could hear a message from you, Gazza, what would you say to him tonight?”

PG: “Well I think the police get hold… Listen, I drove from Newcastle in a taxi to Rothbury. Cost a lot of money. I brought a dressing gown for him, um, a big jacket, I brought some chicken, some bread… I know you’re going to love this one: I brought him a can of lager, I brought him a fishing rod cause I heard he’s by the river. And I brought a fishing rod too – we’ll fish together, I’ll have a chat with him, just talk and… ’cause I think I’m the only man… I think I can help him through this cause I’ve…”

Host: “So Gazza, are you going to go to the police and say, please, let me, let me, let me help you here? I know Raoul Moat. I can help you negotiate. I can help you sort the situation out.

PG: “I’ve just spoke to the police.”

Host 2: “What did they say Gazza?”

PG: “That he, well er, er, well… Terry was next to us taking photos and the copper went, police, and I said ‘Listen, I know the guy, he’s a nice guy,’ I said er… ‘I want to go through, where you have everything all cordoned off, I want to get through there,’ but the police wouldn’t let us so that was a waste of time saying, ‘Oh, I knew him’ because they were being frightened he might shoot me, you know? But I told them, ‘He will not shoot me.'”

Host: “Well, it’s a dangerous situation though, Gazza, isn’t it?”

PG: “Hey I’m not scared – I’ve just been in a car crash, I’ve just hit the wall at 90 miles per hour. I survived that, I’m sure I can survive a bullet. Knowing my luck he’d probably miss.”

Host: “So what you’re saying is that you want to go in there, you want to help negotiate?”

PG: “… The police know I want to go in there. I’ve got a jacket, I’ve got a dressing gown, I’ve got some chicken, I’ve got some bread, I’ve got a can of lager, I’ve got a fishing rod, um, I’ve got my fishing rod, I’m willing to sit down, to shout, ‘Moaty, it’s Gazza!’ All I want to shout is ‘Moaty, it’s Gazza, where are you?’ and I guarantee he will shout his name out, ‘I’m here!’ and me and him could sit and chat, have a little bit of fishing and all I’ll tell him, ‘Moaty, listen…'”

Host: “And you think you could sort it out?”

Host 2: “So if you like a man-to-man chat, with him, two pals on a riverbank?”

PG: “Yeah, yeah, two friends on a riverbank from Newcastle and all those years we’ll say is ‘Why don’t you just, you know, put the gun away, throw it in the river’ and say ‘Look Moaty, the worst is… the worst you might get a 12-year stretch, the police are not going to kill you,’ because I know he’s willing to give in now. Whatever he was on has worn off. I mean the police are not going to kill you, he might do a 12-year stretch, obviously for killing someone, which is not very nice, obviously. He did it cause he was high on drugs, probably, right?”

It looks like Gazza was drawn inexorably to the spotlight, as it’s the only place he feels comfortable, the only place he ever felt like himself. He can’t function normally outside of that light. And saying “Knowing my luck he’d miss” about Moat possibly shooting him… well, it’s clear Gazza is a very troubled man who finds it difficult to function on a day-to-day basis. It’s awful, really, as you suspect a part of Gazza wanted Moat to take him along for the ride.

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54 Comments

  1. fingers says:

    idiot

  2. gdsjfsa says:

    such a troubled man, once a legend- still a legend to some!! I feel so sory for gazza!!

  3. Alan says:

    Get this guy help, he’s clearly in need of it.

  4. Mark Sargeant says:

    Go on gazza. We should send Gazza to do all negotiations, he could like, sit down, like with Obaama and like have a few tinnies and do some fishing and werk oot tuff problems like.

    LOL

  5. Lee says:

    The transcript is terribly inaccurate, I just listened to the whole thing. It was loony toons, but not as above.

  6. Jim from Essex says:

    What Planet is Paul on these days?

    This guy needs serious help or he will end up like Moat.

    Take him in for treatment now.

  7. Dabe says:

    Errr, yes it is accurate Lee. The guy’s a drunken dick

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9BZBh6FPBY

  8. Gratian says:

    The negotiations were going well until Gazza turned up and then Moat blew his brains out.

  9. MarkieMark says:

    This man is an idiot troubled or not! Moat killed a man, tried to kill his ex & has tried to kill a policeman who will be blind & yet he’s a good lad! Seeing other comments on other sites about Moat some people seem to see him as somekind of hero! He’s not! & he took the cowards way out!! Gazza you are in need of help but I don’t think theres anything anyone can do for you!!

  10. John says:

    He’s completely gone.

    Gascoigne left Newcastle 22 years ago so Moat was working on the doors aged 15?

    Time to section the lad again. The nixt time we hear owt about him, it’s going to be his death, surely.

    • Mecca says:

      Gazza left Newcastle Utd but NEVER left Newcastle itself. Even at Lazio he spent ALL of his spare time back home

  11. Ollie says:

    It’s real tragicomedy, this.

  12. Iain says:

    Like many bullies of his type, Moat was, ultimately, a coward, who chose the easy way out. His boastful threats to wage war on the police and the public at large came largely to nothing. He was, it appears, a typical steroid enhanced neanderthal and society is much better off without him. Gazza is a fool. Apparently, he always has been – and were it not for a certain amount of skill with a football, no one would have ever of heard of him. It is somehow pathetically typical of him to strike an odd note in the aftermath of this incident. He is completely out of touch with reality as, curiously, was his mate, the late Mr. Moat…

  13. James says:

    It’s not enirely accurate or they’ve missed out a section – Gazza said he would ‘wander the moors’ calling out Moaty’s name until he found him.

    Completely bats*it insane.

  14. CUFC4EVER. says:

    There’s nothing to do for him now, it’s too late. Unfortunately he is going to die. It’s gone beyond the alcohol he’s just lost his mind.

    R.I.P Gazza

  15. CJ says:

    All you fucking wankers saying Gaza is a dick, a idiot or anyone who thinks its funny should try having to cope with a loved one who suffers from being a alcoholic.

    Having to cope with someone who is so depresed they have to do this to themselves on a daily basis isn’t funny nor does it make them a idiot. It makes them someone who is finding it hard to cope with something.

    So next time someone dies or something forces you to drink lets all take the piss out of you and see how you fucking like it you senseless bastards.

  16. MarkieMark says:

    Some people do suffer with problems like hor simliar im & some of us may even been commenting on Gazza! Sorry but he is an idiot in my view & always will be! Life is tough & hard & hard to cope with! Alot of people have problems & deal with them or get help! Has he? Thats actually senseless & don’t call people bastards!! Its rude!!!

  17. Avril says:

    How sad, perhaps Gazza did know him.I just think this kind of reporting is for shock factor and to sell papers. He is a sick man ,but hey we are all even sicker for making a fool of him. It is all a bit like school when you had the ones who were the in-crowd and the rest were fair game. Should we all not just grow up and see just what happened here,tow people lost their lives and the poor girl was injured. Shame on all that can make stupid remarks.

  18. MarkieMark says:

    Also I think your missing the point here! No one is saying that anyone with drinking problems should be mocked but Gazza himself was making a mockery of the Moat situation! He hadn’t seen him for years but turns up drunk to give him beer, chicken, mobiles, coats & a fishing rod!! Lets be honest if he wasn’t looking to get attention from the media then he is clearly an idiot & I doubt his being there was welcomed by anyone in particular the police! Thats why he’s been mocked……….Well thats why I commented!!

  19. paul shields says:

    gazza drunk again

  20. aldo says:

    what a clown. i think gazza needs help, he shouldnt be allowed to roam the streets. he,s a hasbeen.how could he think that him talkin to moat could possiblly bring this sorry tale to a peacefull conclusion. get him back in rehab then walter smith can sign him for rangers. im sure he will feel at home wae his other hun mate hasbeens, up the ra.hail. hail. daft geordie fucker.

  21. shaun says:

    just goes to show playing for rangers has left its mark on the boy..started with invisible flutes…

  22. Danny says:

    If he’s not in a padded cell tonight, then wtf do social workers earn money for exactly?

  23. nick says:

    All i can say is all you are going by is what is written or aired on the news…The police tazered him which sent him in a spasm then thats what killed him , so well done police again and the Britsh press for publishing bullshit and causing another death which colud of been resolved in a lot of other ways…The police are just as much to blame and this is why i have no respect for them!!!

  24. Paul says:

    I wonder if Gazza took some bait. Was it roast chicken? He should have taken some board games and inflatables to splash around with!Something is missing from Gazza’s picnic haha

  25. mizman says:

    this is the best thing i haver ever read. ever

  26. IdontThinkSo says:

    To CJ:

    you said: So next time someone dies or something forces you to drink lets all take the piss out of you and see how you fucking like it you senseless bastards.

    Care to explain how something can force you to drink? Gazza has been a walking disaster for many years, just one of a long line of footballers who have struggled with the same issue, Baxter, Best, Adams, the list goes on. It seems to me that this behaviour is celebrated by the fans as long as the players are performing in the pitch. Gazza is a child in a man’s body and he’s been this way as long as I’ve been aware of him. The people close to him, all these best pals he has, have been asleep at the wheel. I agree with one of the other posters in that his obit can’t be far away unless he burns through a couple of livers on the way, just like Baxter did.

  27. deekw says:

    I just hope Gazza is getting some kind of help. His brain has gone to mush and radio stations should stop puting him on air, it is not fair to him.

  28. Pete says:

    Why do people assume that footballers have brains? Yes there are a number of well educated ones but the majority! What would the likes of Rooney, Terry and Cole have been if they had not been blessed with a modicum of Football talent.The England team were the worst we have ever produced at a world cup and the most overpaid. At least poor Gazza put his heart and soul in it. I suppose in his troubled mind he meant well.

  29. marshy says:

    Gazza was and still is a legend!!! The press are 2blame 4this they have pestered him 4years drove him 2the beer just leave the man alone!!! Its a shame no football club have the balls to take him under there wing nd let him coach young players!! After all he gave 4football he deserves that chance surly???

  30. Raekim says:

    What Moat did was disgraceful and he should pay for what he did. But for people to say he took the cowards way out upsets me. He did not. I have lost a dear family member through suicide and trust me he is not a coward. It would have been easier for Moat to turn the gun on the police and have them kill him. As for Gazza it was funny interview but a tragic one.I feel so sorry for him and his family – it must be so hard on them – he’s not a bad bloke he just doesn’t understand what he’s doing is not the right thing.

  31. d man says:

    GO ON GAZZA U FUKIN LEGEND

  32. largey says:

    The police should have let Gazza talk to Moat,might have commited hari kari sooner and saved public money.might have been luckier and shot Gazza as well as its only a matter of time before before Gazza does something stupid again and may hurt some one as well as himself.Complete waste of talent.If thats what playing for the scum does for you Shearer must be shitting himself.

  33. marky b says:

    hilarious! you cant help but smile when thinking about gazza turning up 5hitfaced with a fishing rod!! lol

  34. oli says:

    tht wos funny as fuk nd u cj shhht dafty :P

  35. Joanneee says:

    Aww Thats A Wee Shame On That Man, Awww Kiissss xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  36. gary says:

    shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh jo

  37. Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Garyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, Awww Poorr Man RIP love :)

  38. Caran :) says:

    These comments about gazza are going a bit over the top,the man has problems thats obvious so any one who wants to pull him apart for this should keep there nasty comments to there self! Im sure it would be a totally different story if it was them who or one of there family member’s who had these problems ,no one no’s what the future is going to bring so dont be too quick as it could be you in the future. He is a legend and always will be!!!!!! I agree with pete he put his heart and soul into maybe wasnt the best time but he ment well.

  39. Delboy Dublin says:

    Could have been worse… it could have been Chris Waddle or Gareth Southgate who showed up. Neither of them is any use in a shoot-out

  40. rockingv says:

    hey up Nick

    You KNOW that’s what happened do you ? Well in that case you must be a member of a Police armed patrol and witnessed it ! or even pulled the tazer trigger ….but no you’re one of the monday morning Managers who can see (with 20/20 hindsight) what people have done wrong as you sit on your Fat Arse watching or reading the P*ss Poor journalistic standards displayed in this Country. Why don’t you have a pop at the family and friends who let Moate behave in the crude and bullying manner he did over the years culminating in him shooting 3 unarmed people ?

  41. SPEN says:

    gazza lost the plot best thing i see for a long time [ PRAT ]

  42. spen says:

    someone tazer gazza he might wake up out of is little world he lives

  43. kell says:

    arm all police now…and gary lineker help your old mate now he needs you..

  44. C Robb says:

    Get him on a plane as an envoy for palestine and isreal.With the work he did for secretarianism in glasgow he will take pork with him as a gift for the jews and t shirts with targets on them for the palestines.Hes a perfect example of a star kid gone wrong.

  45. AO says:

    I’m sure Gazza mean’t well but he was never going to get through that cordon especially as he’s have a few. Part of the problem of being an alcoholic is that the rational part of your brain closes down and everything is done on impulse. I’m sure he genuinely thought he could make an impact on Moat but if he hadn’t been drinking I don’t think he would have done so. But then again gazza being Gazza he may have still tried to

  46. mark says:

    this is better than palin or eric idle at very best. let me buy
    gazza a gun – hopefully he only wound himself and
    have a slow agonising trip to the after life……….

  47. MarkieMark says:

    Looks like Gazza has checked into a clinic! Hopefully this will help him!!…………..Oh & to the poster who thinks Moat is brave by killing someone you are a prat! Its not brave to shoot three unarmed people & then hide for seven days & then when your found hold a gun to yourself because “Nobody cares for you” If he had any bottle Moat would have taken on the police snipers & gone out in a blaze of glory but of course he didn’t!!! Coward!!!

  48. The Equalizer says:

    Moat, shot a policeman at point blank range, shot his girlfriend and then shot dead the Karate instructor boyfriend, if he was the tough guy some morons on this post think then why didn’t he ask the karate instructor out into the street man to man? why because the karate instructor would have knocked noodle soup out of him, so he shot him, ooh brave, and then he sneaks up on a policeman in his car and blasts him without warning. It is always and will always be cowards like this that are dangerous the reason being is that they are not infact hard nuts at all, so resort to avoiding physical challenges as they know they’ll lose, total wanker. Gazza saying he’s a lovely bloke just shows the state of his brain.

  49. ged says:

    CJ – STFU TARD n go suck on your boyfriend you cock munching mofo!

  50. […] the wake of the surreal Raoul Moat saga, Paul Gascoigne – aka the most talented but also tragic English footballer of the last 20 […]

  51. KnucklefighterNewcastle says:

    I would like to clarify, I think the radio station should of not allowed someone who has such personal problems in the media to voice as I believe the wording should of been viewed before broadcast, however some of the comments made by Mr Gazza seemed to be slightly exagorated to say the least and slightly comical.

    My oppinion about Moat was he had problems maybe early mental stain leading to isolated stress depression, he did ask for help, I heard the words in the documentary, and in today society unfortunately his request slipped through the net, I do not agree that we did enough and the matter could of been resolved better.

    Let me come to the Law of the UK again unfortunately, todays law could be deamed corrupt let me just tell you why, its one thing for one and another for another, it should be equal Law should be Law, you commit a crime you pay by the penilty given out.

    However the law maybe corrupt, put that seat belt on else I will fine you,have you been drinking can I smell you breath ok proceed.

    In the case of Mr Moat Police already knew about him he I understand he announced in prison or on release he was going to do something unreasonable to put things right, why did the police not take this into consideration.

    Firstly I believe they could of been scared, the backbone had been cracked in two no more, it takes a crime to happen before the justice is served.

    I will explain I call the police a pesrson is harrassing me, oh if he comes back call us, he comes back, I call the police he is only visiting you what can we do, help me as a citizen, stop him harrassing me, sorry we can not do anything….Bump.

    News report a man was shot dead as he opened the door to Rupert the bear, police are investigating the situation and THATS THAT.

    It takes deaths Mayhem and rampage and distuction before the Law in the UK takes action to isolate a situation, the situation went on for too long, a man was killed a police officer was blinded whatever whatever I think its about time the Law in the UK started to do what they are supposed to do, and also some person out there should analiyse the wording of Mr Gazza in a more reasonable way he was like an old Army Guy he used to serve us well, but now after all his lime light and troubles no one is pulling him in, he may not be a stable guy either so I believe all the people who comment on he is a Bstd a Dick or whatever, to help society and save time and request he is sectioned under whatever, he maynot be harmful at the moment but what if something similar escalated next week, then who is to blame the people to blame are the people who already knew.

    So who already knew, we will never know, if we had of known, Mr Moat would most likely never gone down the road he did.

    A leason learned its about people who want to be heard, but this is no excuse to Kill or hurt people as you have now left the Earth labelled a coward by most, it amazes me when you have left the Earth how people praise you aswell.

    All I can say to bring this to a conclusion the wording was in front of you the words were spoken, it was someone choice to not take it seriously, Like you should not take the comments by Gazza Seriously as he is highlighted by his dream like fantasy that he was going to be allowed to sit with Mr Moat, Gazza get help or someone close to him get him sorted before it ends in another news report of similar catastrophic circumstances.

    I am sorry if my typo is error outraged however we all have differences of oppinion this is mine and I hope lessons have been learned…… Daz KFN…..

  52. Go on gaza says:

    Go gazza get ya head out ov moattys arse

  53. Stan says:

    Absolute stupid nutter! Perhaps he could sort out the Middle East Crisis with a pork chop?
    Listen, there’s all this, “HE WAS A LEGEND..” BOO-HOO etc. But so-f******-what?? There are lots of alcoholics! Most have to sort THEMSELVES out! And Gazza? Not a nice person. Does this “I’m a Geordie…” rubbish, but as soon as the opportunity arose, ran away to London, Italy and only wanted to return when NUFC hit the big time under Keegan. (Apparently when he visited during the 1990s, he really acted the big “I am”! So the end paragraph of this piece is absolutely right.) Knocked that woman around. And, to be fair, if anyone who wasn’t famous, constantly came out with these semi-literate, laughable, incoherent rants, they would be ridiculed to death! What’s so special about “Gazza”? Has he still got credit in the bank from doing what he did in a self-serving way? He’s a moronic, selfish mug, who wants to be loved by the masses for what he did once, now long ago. I always laugh at that stupid football scribbler, thick as s***, who always says “WE…” (who???) “must all get together to HELP Gazza.” Then forgets about him and does nothing until the next time that he’s asked. Moat and Gascoigne? Roid-rage Psycho meets village idiot, THE END!

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