Shit Football Ink: 16 Of The Very Worst Fan Tattoos

Chris Wright

6th, September 2013

6 Comments

By Chris Wright

In honour of the poor Liverpool fan who tried his darndest to show his love for Kolo Toure via the medium of tattoos only to fall at the final hurdle, here’s 16 of the very worst fan body etchings to have ever sullied our consciousness here on Pies…

1. Clint Dempsey: Like a severely malnourished Mr Potato Head…

dempsey

2. We Are Liverpool: Rafa Benitez in nowt but a cape, loincloth and sandals? Powerful imagery…

liverpool

3. Eeverton: Rookie mistake…

everton

4. Just say no-mar: Every wondered what Neymar would look like if he came down with an aggressive case of mumps? Well, wonder no more…

Neymar1

5. Frank + John 4eva: Contrary to popular belief, this isn’t actually etched across Frank’s stomach…

lamps-terry

6. Five-star ink: What could be a more fitting way to commemorate Liverpool’s fifth European Cup triumph than by getting a lop-sided tattoo of Eddie Munster and Ray from ‘Due South’?…

carra-benitez

7. Shitty forever: This prannet had his optimistic tattoo done in 2009 as part of a post-pub wager (always dangerous) with a United-supporting mate. To be fair, you’ll no doubt remember that City came incredibly close to winning the 2011 Champions League – narrowly missing out when they were knocked out in the Europa League round of 16 by Dynamo Kiev…

city-tattoo

8. All roads lead to Munic: This Chelsea fan was universally panned by all and sundry after unveiling his post-Champions League victory tatt on Twitter in 2012. After receiving a slew of insults about his slight oversight, he added: ” “OK I forgot the ‘H’, get it done Sunday.”

munic

9. Santos Santos Santos Santos Santos, etc, etc: The “copy + paste” button obviously got stuck…

santos

10. I ♥ Romanov: Something tells us the regret is strong in this one…

romanov

11. Tattoo sleeves: This die-hard Atletico Nacional had the club’s entire home shirt tattooed onto his upper body permanently, front and back. That’s some impressive dedication to the cause…

nacional

12. What an arse: Another half-cut bet gone horribly awry…

kenny

13. The father, the son and the Holy Goat: We’re sure there’s a back story here, but we just don’t want to know…

robinho

14. King Les: Newcastle fan Robert Nesbitt was so enamoured with Andy Cole’s prowess in front of goal that he decided to have a thigh-sized tattoo of the striker needled about his person. Unfortunately, before Rob’s tattoo had even begun to scab over, Cole upped sticks and joined Manchester United. Never fear, for Rob had a back-up plan: turn it into a tribute to Les Ferdinand instead…

cole-ferdinand

15. Hoots of derision: All you need to know is that Sheffield Wednesday were established in 1867…

wednesday

16. ???

British soccer fan with tattoed face smiles as he parties in the centre of Donetsk

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