Pies Classics: Top 10 Celebrity Football Triallists
By Ollie Irish
Football-loving celebrities bore the arse off me. Ooh, there’s Robbie Williams gurning in a Port Vale shirt! Oh, and look at Ant & Dec swigging bottled beer in a sponsors’ box at St James’ Park! And, yes, Ralf Little, you’re a half-decent defender (by celeb standards) but stick to what you do best – hang on, what exactly is it you do best? Turning up for celebrity five-aside tournaments, it seems.
Anyway, the 10 celebs listed below get my respect because they actually had trials at a proper professional club. Some of the names you’ll know already; some will come as a big surprise…
Gordon Ramsay (Glasgow Rangers) - The swearing chef actually played twice for Rangers' first team, both times as a sub, but never recovered from ligament injury and was let go, by no-nonsense Rangers manager Jock Wallace (a man Ramsay describes as 'a Scottish version of Mike Tyson').

















Named And Shamed: 37 English Clubs Offering Unpaid Jobs – Sporting Intelligence
2013 Champions League Final Viewing Companion – Dirty Tackle
Very Best Of ESPN FC's Toe Poke Blog 2012/13
The 'Transfer Talks' Flowchart – Football Cliches
Remembering Ivan Turina – A Football Report
Moyes Has Done Sod All To Deserve United Job – Johnny Nic For F365
Anfield: The Victims, The Anger And The Shameful Truth – Guardian
The A-Z Of Football Boot Brands – The Boot Room
Man Utd Coach Delivers Opinion On Rooney's Form – Off The Post
19 Rules Of Playing Football When You're A Kid – BuzzFeed
Two rumours of worthy note are Paul John Paul II’s footballing days, and existentialist, Albert Camus. Naturally, I’m far too lazy to check.
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