Big Heads: 20 Of The Least Flattering Corinthian Figures Ever Made (Photos)

Chris Wright

21st, August 2015

4 Comments

Famed for playing fast and loose when it came to likenesses, Pies thought we’d take the opportunity to examine some of the least flattering Corinthian football figurines ever committed to resin.

Let’s delve in shall we, starting with a real howler…

Wayne Rooney

Somehow even more potato-ier than the real thing…

rooney-corinthians

Mark Crossley

Big Norm had a certain rugged charm about him. This looks like ‘lumbering henchman #2’ from every action film ever made…

crossley-corinthian

Lee Bowyer

The smug b*stard…

bowyer-corinthian

Tim Sherwoord

Try, try, try as they might, they just couldn’t get Timmy right…

sherwood-corinthian

Ronaldo

Not even close…

ronaldo

Charlie Adam

Looks like he spends his days trying to stop billy goats crossing his bridge…

adam-corinthian

David Beckham

Classic Becks, with trademark fly-away fringe and Vietnam vet 1,000-yard stare…

beckham-corinthians

Paul Warhurst

Just unnecessarily harsh. Corpses have been dredged out of rivers in better nick..

warhurst-corinthian

Dennis Wise

All confuzzled…

wise-sinclair

Tony Adams

Looks more like Nicholas Lyndhurst…

adams-corinthian

Scott Gemmill

Definite frizz problems up top…

gemmil-corinthians

Michael Reiziger

Come on now, that’s just cruel…

reiziger-corinthian

Clarence Seedorf

Obviously made by somebody who had no earthly idea what a ‘Clarence Seedorf’ was…

seedorf-corinthian

Fabio Coloccini

Dead ringer for Michael Bolton…

coloccini-corinthian

Henrik Larsson

Larsson probably has grounds to sue over this one…

larsson-corinthians

Frank Sinclair

Amazingly, Corinthian have managed to capture Frank’s general air of bungling calamity…

sinclair-corinthian

Gareth Bale

There’s malice in them thar eyes…

bale-corinthians

Robbie Fowler

Duuuh, gee boss…

fowler-corinthian

Oliver Kahn

Looking like the butch warden at a 1950s women’s correctional facility…

kahn-corinthian

Carlos Valderrama

Absolutely spot on (apart from the hair and face)…

valderrama-corinthian

Bloody hell. Thank God that’s over. We don’t think we could’ve taken any more.

If you’ve got any other shouts Pies fans, then we’d love to see ’em!

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