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A random football list: Top 40 magnificent moustaches

Where did all the moustaches go? These days it’s all bare upper lips and waxed chests. Shame. Get a load of this…
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Caesar Jenkyns
Hail Caesar. The rugged Welshman was one of the hardest defenders of his era - he played for Woolwich Arsenal from 1895-96, and became the Gooners’ first ‘international’ captain.
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Bob Holmes
Elementary.
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Albert Iremonger
What’s an iremonger anyway? A tache salesman perhaps? Anyway, this is tremendous and not a little sinister.
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Charlie Paynter
Paynter was manager of West Ham from 1932-1950. This is a quite brilliantly groomed example of the tache genre.
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George Best
He didn’t have a tache for long, but he wore it bloody well.
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Steve Heighway
The first Liverpool player on this list.
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Terry McDermott
… And another.
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Frank Worthington
Ladies, fancy a ride in my Ford Capri?
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Giuseppe Bergomi
X-rated.
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Viv Anderson
Viv’s fuzz thickened with age. This is an early example.
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Graeme Souness
One word: Begbie.
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Willie Miller
One word: Begbie.
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Tommy Smith
Scary, very scary.
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Ronald Spelbos
Leave it to the Dutch to master the ‘total moustache’.
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Brian Kilcline
First he makes the ponytail hall of fame. Now this.
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Billy Hughes
Leicester’s No.1 gringo.
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Mark Lawrenson
Lawro has since ditched his tache. We miss it.
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Alan Sunderland
Yikes!
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Claudio Gentile
Possibly the hardest, dirtiest defender in football history. Here he tries to wear Zico like a cheap suit, at the 1982 World Cup.
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Bruce Grobbelaar
And the Liverpool players keep on comin’.
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Neville Southall
At last, an Everton player to break the Reds’ monopoly.
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Sam Allardyce
Lookin’ good, Sam.
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Rene Higuita
The moustache is the least of his problems.
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Des Walker
Sharp.
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Des Lynam
And we hit you up with another Des. Bam!
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Chris Kamara
No, he hasn’t changed much since his playing days.
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Clayton Blackmore
Wow. That is one unconvincing tache.
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Carlos Valderrama
Legend.
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Sieb Dykstra
The whole look is amazing.
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Ruud Gullit
Not Ruud’s best look.
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Jimmy Greaves
Never really favoured the tache as a player, but he’s been representing ever since.
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Rudi Voller and Frank Rijkaard
A two-for-one deal. And I’ll take any excuse to post up this picture.
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Derek Mountfield
No.
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Ian Rush
Put your hands up if you look like a dick.
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David Seaman
Smoooooth.
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Vicente del Bosque
None of your pencil tache flimsiness for Del Bosque. This is a man’s tache.
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Tony Daley
DeBarge.
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Big Phil Scolari
Hackman.
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Michael Ballack
Grown for a Mercedes advert. He should have kept it.

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By Ollie Irish on July 13th, 2009 in Featured, Horror Hair, Top 10s & lists. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
comments

9 Responses to “A random football list: Top 40 magnificent moustaches”

  1. Dublin Delboy says:

    Good to see Gary Neville carrying on the proud Blackmore-esque tradition at Old Trafford i.e. looking like a hormonal (possibly female) teenager!

  2. Fredmeister says:

    Hackman=Scolari=genious

  3. Andy says:

    Two Colombians on the list!

  4. Mark says:

    Luis Felipe Gene Hackman = Legendary

  5. AR says:

    is rijkaard launching a loogie on voller?

  6. sirA says:

    Yeah – that’s from the 90 WCup in the first elimination round. Obviously one of Rikjaard’s lesser moments. They both got shown reds.

  7. Thomas says:

    HAHAHA!
    Don’t know how the hell I ended up with this wierd page…but I had a good laugh!
    Yeah…lots of scourcers here..haha. Only one Man United, Clayton…though I don’t remember him with beard ever – hmmm…did you photoshop his? ;-)

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