Top Ten Oscar-Worthy Footballers (Videos)

Chris Wright

1st, March 2011

29 Comments

By Chris Wright

We know we’re a little ‘late to the party’ with this one but, in celebration of the 83rd Academy Awards which were held in Los Angeles on Sunday night, here are Pies’ top ten nominations for ‘Best Footballing Actor in a Simulated Role’…

10. Kader Keita – Brazil vs Ivory Coast, 2010:

The rib bone’s connected to the face bone…

9. Oleksandr Aliyev – Arsenal vs Dynamo Kyiv, 2008:

Russian midfielder takes ‘playing possum’ to new heights…

8. Steven Taylor – Newcastle vs Aston Villa, 2005:

When the old ‘clutching the imaginary exit wound’ routines fails to fool anyone…

7. Emerson Acuna – Atletico Junior vs America, 2008:

‘Simulation incroyable’ indeed…

6. Steven Gerrard – Liverpool vs Bolton, 2006:

Stevie G MBE has a fair old back-catalogue to file through as this video will duly attest to, but his leg-buckling wilt against Bolton (1:30) just about stands out from the rest of his oeuvre…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Abk9JSDBra4

5. Jens Lehmann – Arsenal vs Bolton, 2006:

Mad Jens at the peak of his powers…

4. Sergio Busquets – Barcelona vs Inter Milan, 2010:

Peek-a-boo…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRpKcStGwmU

3. Jurgen Klinsmann – Germany vs Argentina, 1990:

Many of today’s aspirant footballing hams consider this appalling effort to be genesis as far as the relatively modern practice of ‘spine-arching’ is concerned…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tB7Y33VteME

2. Rivaldo – Brazil vs Turkey, 2002:

Rivaldo found himself fined £5,180 by FIFA for this peerless piece of ‘method’, though the Brazilian playmaker didn’t seem overly phased – assuring reporters that he ‘wasn’t sorry about anything’…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UgfRCa71Kmw

1. Alberto Gilardino – Celtic vs AC Milan, 2007:

Utterly pathetic, but in a truly truly astounding way…

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tLnCrjWACHU

That’s right, no Didier Drogba…deal with it.

Missed any pearlers? Give us a nudge in the comments box below…