As I said to my flatmate last night, I love Barca as a club â€“Â€Â“ great fans, great history, the fact they refused to sully their shirt with a sponsor for so long etc. â€“ but they have the most annoying players in the world:
Ronaldinho raises his chubby arms â€“ is it me or is he putting on
weight? â€“Â€Â“ and asks for a foul whenever an opponent dares to try and
tackle him, then when he loses the ball is too vain/tubby to track
back. Extra c**t points for wearing that big hairband.
Deco, top player that he is, needs a slap. He is a little shit.
Carlos ‘The Pubehead’ Puyol whines like a long-haired girl when any decision goes against him. Plus he’s massively overrated.
Victor Valdes is too busy checking his Pixar Studios quiff to bother being a decent keeper.
Rafael Marquez is a relentlessly dirty player and wears the same big hairband as Ronaldinho.
Gianluca Zambrotta has, er, stupid facial hair and gets away with fouls way too often.
Samuel Eto’o is arrogant, petulant and, based on last night’s evidence ( a white, safari-style jacket?), wears silly designer clothes that even David Beckham wouldn’t touch.
Lionel Messi has a double chin, looks and acts like a 14-year-old schoolboy and yet still manages to be brilliant. Not fair.