Anything Lionel Messi Can Do, Joe Cole Can Do Better – Steven Gerrard

Ollie Irish

10th, August 2010


By Ollie Irish

Have fun with this, please. But play nice…

“[Lionel] Messi can do some amazing things, but anything he can do Joe [Cole] can do as well, if not better. He used to shock us in training by doing footy tricks with a golf ball that most players can’t even do with a football. I really fancy Joe for the [player of the year] award this season.”

Steven Gerrard on his new Liverpool team-mate. But Seriously.

Messi hears what Steven Gerrard said about Joe Cole

I don’t know what to add to this, really. Messi is much better than Cole, obviously. And, er, that’s about it. Gerrard needs glasses. And someone to tell him when to open his mouth. And better taste in music – too much Phil Collins f*cks with a man’s brain. Apart from that, he’s great.

I mean, Joey Cole is a fantastic talent and all, but to compare him with Messi – seemingly based on a few tricks in training and not a lot else – is way beyond absurd. Perhaps if it came to the World Golf Ball Keepy-Up Championship, Cole would prevail. Otherwise, forgetaboutit.

In Big Ronglish, Stevie G has been ‘watching cartoons’ if he thinks any English player can touch Messi.

Via Guardian

Rave Dog endorses this post:

Posted in Chelsea, FAIL, Liverpool

Share this article: Email


  1. Meji says:

    ROFL at the caption. Gerrard is a funny character.

  2. mizman says:

    another scouser on crack then

  3. Alex says:

    joe cole has always seems liek a bit of a circus performer to me and i mean that in the nicest sense. a lot of great tricks but no end product.

    I always wanted him to crack it and chelsea and he never managed it (imho). shame, he seems like a good lad

  4. blitzen says:

    Oh, Stevie. *facepalm* You’ve just got to love him, though, don’t you? Bless!

    Based on this, Ozil with his chewing gum trick is now the Best Footballer of All Time!

  5. C says:

    Im a liverpool fan, and even Im embarrased by this…

  6. In fairness, Joe Cole is far better at balding whilst having a babyface thus looking like an awkward teenage monk than Messi.
    That’s definitely the angle Stevie G was coming from…

  7. Thomas says:

    Cocaine is a hell of a drug, G-man.

  8. Hirsty says:

    In fairness, I can kind of see what he’s trying to say. Joey Cole probably can do more tricks with a golf ball than Messi could, as I don’t see Messi as the kind of player to give to much of a shit about being able to stand there and see how many times he can twirl a ball around. I see kids in the park that could put them both to shame, but just because you can do a rabona with an orange doesn’t mean you can play football!

  9. Luke says:

    I think Stevie meant any tricks messi can do cole can do as well or better

  10. kathmcp says:

    Tricks with a golf ball? Is Joe Cole a Bangkok lady-boy?

  11. Greg says:

    Gerrard did say he was better at ‘some’ things.

    He was probably referring to tricks and flashy skills and that, as that’s probably true.

    I don’t think he said that Cole was a better player than Messi.

  12. Tom Addison says:

    And that is stage one in the process that builds to England believing they can win Brazil 2014.

  13. jack says:

    when did he ever say he’s a better player? he didn’t. he’s talking about the the flashy tricks. which i don’t think he’s out of line for saying.

    is it so hard for you to run an unbiased blog? your hate for this guy is so obvious. anytime gerrard does something slightly out of line you are practically foaming at the mouth to make a fuss over it.

  14. Nikhil says:

    Joe must hav done some amazin tricks with stevie’s balls

Leave a Reply