Man City Finally Release Michael Johnson – Behold His Horrible Fat Disgusting Bloated Lardo Monster Face!
By Chris Wright
Michael Johnson circa 2008
Having made his last appearance for the club as a substitute against Scunthorpe in October 2009, Manchester City have today finally released long-dormant midfielder Michael Johnson. ‘Tis a sad, sad day for football.
According to the Guardian, Johnson was offered a severance package by City before Christmas after being convicted of two drink-driving offences last September, but the 24-year-old declined – preferring to sit on his arse and collect his weekly wages (which we’ve seen estimated an anywhere between £25,000-£40,000 every seven days) while he became ever more out of shape and unfit.
Sounds like a dream job to us, but hey ho!
A photo of Johnson as he looks today is currently being circulated, which has been reacted to in some circles – i.e, Twitter – as if Johnson has transmogrified into the kind of freakish, heavingly obese 45-stone monster that has to be lifted in a specially-made sling by a tower crane just to get out of his chair.
In actuality, he just looks like a fairly normal young lad who’s been injured for nigh-on three years a put a couple of stone on…
Yes, it’s sad that a once-promising talent has petered out and, yes, it’s also sad that he didn’t appear to be able to help himself, but let’s not get unnecessarily vicious about this people.
(Image: BBC Sporf)