2 Watching Channel 4 property programmes while ignoring a nagging feeling of deja-vu
3 Attempting to sing Sex Pistols songs in a Jose Mourinho voice
4 Attempting to sing Sex Pistols songs in a Sir Alex Ferguson voice
5 Using the internet to researchtumbleweed
6 Using the internet to research either side’s starting line-up
7 Watching a long interview with Alan Shearer
8 Googling yourself
9 Making a DIY zebra out of a horse
10 Clive Tyldesley