Pies Chart: What Wayne Rooney Is Made Of

Ollie Irish

30th, June 2010


By Ollie Irish

What constitutes one Wayne Rooney? We break it down in chart form:

Findings: He’s mostly pink spam, then, held together an unhealthy amount of sweary rage. You can add in your own false hope and hype if you want, safe in the knowledge that Wazza will disappoint you.

Posted in Man Utd

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  1. Jason says:

    Rooney, like ogres, are like onions

  2. Amber says:

    This post cracks me up.

    But you forgot body hair. But I guess since he waxed before the World Cup it does not count any more.

  3. LittleLordFuantelroy says:

    i agree

  4. Bawly says:

    Great shout. Another over rated English player………….. Hopefully this will stop but only if the english commentator’s stop having orgasms every time he touch’s the ball. They make him out to be a genius. He’s not.

  5. Jean Michael Glazer says:

    He has a love child too – has Rooney – called Kai, and he is sh*gging some bird called Colleen, who is also married. Bet that won`t make the papers, never mind Stevie G they are all at it! English bloody pervs – we only sh*g dead stuff over here in Florida…….nighty night!

  6. Mat says:

    Rooney, like every other striker is good when he gets some service, especially with a ball he is used to. When the midfield is crud and give him useless service and Heskey is alongside him, he will always struggle, as will every other striker.

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