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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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The things players get up to in their down time… (click on image below to view gallery)

The best thing Madonna’s bloke has ever done? This full version of Nike’s “Take it to the next level” campaign, which is centered around the rise of a mysterious young Arsenal star, features WAGs, flash cars, random vomiting and some of the best on-pitch camerawork you’ve ever seen. In other words, it’s the best thing […]

A picture gallery of Barca’s new Brazilian being unveiled at the Camp Nou… (click on image to view the whole gallery)

Unofficial pic of Villa’s home shirt for 08/09 This is the new Aston Villa home kit, with new sponsor Acorns – or rather, Villa have given up a lucrative sponsorship deal to support the West Midlands-based children’s charity. An admirable gesture. Do you like kit? One more pic below, and the chance to have your […]

It’s that time again… 1. Career path West Bromwich Albion, Aston Villa, Middlesbrough, Rangers, Sheffield Utd (current) 2. Multiple choice Which English club has the most outright Community (formerly Charity) Shield wins? a) Man Utd, b) Liverpool, c) Arsenal, d) Everton 3. Picture round Who dis? 4. Get shirty Viglen, The Woolwich, Llanera and Redbus […]

Get your kit off This amusing video, shot in the centre of Amsterdam, celebrates the launch of Ajax’s new adidas kit. (We know who we’d like to swap with.)

Who’s top of European clubs’ shopping lists? Here’s who… (click on the image below to view the gallery)

The greatest Ottoman ex-pats

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1. Colin Kazim Richards
CKR – the Coca Cola Kid – not only made himself at home in Turkey, he bagged a Champions League goal for Fenerbahce against Chelsea and broke into the Turkish national team.

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Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome to the Premier League the Horror Hair talents of Marvin Emnes. Middlesbrough’s new signing’s receding afro hairline is begging for a keep-it-simple grade one all over. But no, this 20-year-old isn’t going to bald himself before his time. He’s gone for the backcomb, displaying his copious forehead in all its splendour. Fair play to you, lad.

Who’s on their way out of Stamford Bridge? 1. Shaun Wright Phillips SWP can’t hold down a first-team place at Chelsea, and that won’t change under Scolari, I predict – Wright-Phillips doesn’t feel like a Big Phil type of player. The Brazilian likes intelligent players with exemplary ball control; SWP doesn’t fit the bill. Where […]

Barca star snapped wandering around NYC, looking for new club It’s not a fashion crime as such, simply because Henry manages to look good in just about anything (bastard) – that includes an ironic t-shirt, accessorised with old-school high-top sneakers. Pies verdict Thierry gets away with it; John Terry, for example, wouldn’t. [Via The Spoiler]

Spanish stopper has big future as after-dinner speaker At Spain’s Euro 2008 celebration parade in Madrid, Pepe grabbed the mic and didn’t let it go. He told several jokes – we’re sure they were funny, if you understand Spanish – and then introduced every single member of Spain’s winning squad, as well as coach Luis […]

Gooners look to the past for new Nike away strip An official photograph of Arsenal’s new away kit has been leaked on the worldwide web. The shirt is yellow with navy sleeves and red piping, which is reminiscent of Arsenal’s famous away shirt from the late 1980s. We leaked an unofficial pic of this kit […]

Lardy Brazilian ex-genius still has some skills Fat-Ron, unwanted by Barcelona, showed he still has some magic left in his feet in a comeback friendly, against a Lionel Messi representative game. In his 56 minutes on the pitch, Ron scored twice, made two assists, and generally belied his chunky frame with a nimble performance. Black […]

Sparky makes his first signing Mark Hughes hasn’t wasted much time in strengthening Man City’s sketchy forward roster. Today he unveiled Jo, signed from CSKA Moscow for a “club record” undisclosed fee. In his Moscow days, Jo looked like a windswept crackhead, but he’s since had a haircut, which sucks, because there aren’t enough crackhead […]

Acquaint yourself with Spiderman

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Name Jonas Gutierrez
Age 24 (25 on Saturday)
Nationality Argentinian
Club history Vélez Sársfield, Real Mallorca, Newcastle United (current)

Position
Winger

It had been a long time since Spain won anything, so I suppose you can forgive them for forgetting how to enjoy victory in style. Unfortunately, here they are congaing through Bastian Schweinsteiger’s post-match interview – not just one way, but again the other way! Poor Pigfarmer looks ready to cry.

Yes, he’s still on honeymoon… zzzzz W-Roo has been honeymooning in Vegas with Colleen for several years, seemingly, and he’s still out there, soaking up the sunshine, betting it all on red, and mingling with the stars. On Saturday night he hung out with NBA star LeBron James, at the Wynn hotel’s Blush nightlcub – […]

Two of the Prem big four debut their new on-the-road wear Liverpool and Chelsea have both officially unveiled their new away kits for the coming Premier League season. Liverpool’s, as sported by Stevie-G, is silver and bound to divide opinion – it puts us in mind of the Candy kits of the 1980s. Retro, but […]

This video shows El Nino when he was literally El Nino. Fernando Torres has clearly been scoring classy goals ever since he was 12 years old. The only difference is then he did it with a dodgy basin cut and now he does it with a dodgy ginger strawberry blond mullet. Torres grabs two goals in this match between the Atletico Madrid and AC Milan youth teams in 1996.

Finding the Lonely Hearts of Euro 2008 the perfect home in the Premier League

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Arsenal – Artur Boruc
Poland’s keeper was in top form during the competition and a move to a top four club could be enough to tempt him away from Celtic. The Gunners – with Jens Lehmann on his way out – could be interested.

Dunphy, Brady and co. emply the power of heated debate, when TV coverage of Germany’s semi final againt Turkey was interrupted by bad weather You know that RTE’s pundits could easily keep talking for a whole 90 minutes, if they had to – more, probably. But imagine having to sit through an hour-and-a-half of Lineker, […]

Pies’ cut-out-and-keep guide to Bolton’s £10m striker Name Johan Elmander Age 27 Nationality Swedish Club history Holmalunds, Orgryte, Feyenoord, Brondby, Toulouse, Bolton Wanderers (current) Position Centre-forward. Is he any good? He started two of Sweden’s group games at Euro 2008, albeit out of position, but I didn’t see enough of him to comment on his […]

More ridiculous rumours from Beckhamworld Rumour 1 Becks has stinky fish breath, due to the fact he takes fish oil tablets every day – he’s contracted as the face of Go3 Omega-3 supplements, and reportedly loves the energy the tablets give him. Yeah, because taking fish oil tablets gives you fish breath. Next… [Hollyscoop]

Three of the best videos to give you a flavour of Chelsea’s newest star 1. Deco and C-Ron play football tennis Do I have to have this show pony on my team? More below…