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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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So many of you have requested the return of the FFQ that I couldn’t hold out any longer. No doubt the format of the quiz will evolve in the coming weeks, but for now it has a comfortably familiar look… 1. Crystal Palace, Southend United, Derby County, Charlton Athletic, West Ham United, Charlton Athletic, Watford, […]

A rare WAG lookalike to mix things up a bit: Sarah Alexander is a comedienne/actress best known for her roles in Green Wing and Smack the Pony. Sylvia van der Vaart is – of course – the wife of Real Madrid star Rafael. Got a Shit Lookalike for Pies? You know you have… Email me […]

As we reported earlier, Becks is back with the LA Galaxy. Check out our gallery of the England star in action (includes male toplessness)… Click on the image to launch the gallery:

Simple, classy? Er, no… Click on the image to launch the gallery:

Everton’s new store is located in Liverpool’s biggest shopping mall, aka Liverpool One. Whoever decided to call the store Everton Two has my undying respect. Everton’s megastore, located at Goodison Park, is now called Everton One. Brilliant.

Undisputed quote of the day goes to Noel Gallagher: “I don’t like John Terry and I never have. He’s got funny eyes and he’s a cry baby. He’s also a Cockney and he’d absolutely be coming [to Man City] just for the money.” Can’t argue with that. In an interview with F365, the Oasis star […]

How dare you, America! Becks was booed by a small section of fans during last night’s friendly between LA Galaxy and NT Red Bulls. No biggie though - the boos were to be expected, and it was hardly the cacophony you’d hear reserved for the likes of Emmanuel Eboue and Ashley Cole. As for the game, […]

Can you spot the part of Sepp’s Wiki entry that will very soon be deleted? Check it out (click image to enlarge): Factually accurate too? That’s for you to judge. I give this, ooh, one hour before it’s amended. Also, I highly recommend you enjoy Sepp falling flat on his fat face

You should know the drill by now - can you identify the player with the football face? If you know who it is, leave a comment with your answer… Yesterday’s answer: Dirk Kuyt Yes, quite a few of you recognised the chunky, pale legs of Dirk Kuyt. Nice spot.

Carlos Bianchi is the coach of Boca Juniors. Larry David is the co-creator of Seinfeld and the brains behind the brilliant Curb Your Enthusiasm. Pretty… pretttty… pretttttttty good work by Andres Lopez. Thanks for the suggestion, Andres. Got a Shit Lookalike for Pies? Email me with your nomination(s).

I don’t remember the Backstreet Boys having this many members. [Photo: PA] At ESPN’s annual sports awards (like the Oscars for sport in the States), the US men’s national team won the ‘Upset’ award, for their overperformance at the 2009 Confederations Cup. It’s a good sign that ‘soccer’ is starting to edge into the mainstream […]

Ah, I love the smell of schadenfreude in the morning. Enjoy… Looks like a dive to me. Yellow card, at least, for that. (Btw, this looks like it could be very old, but I’ve not seen it before.) One to watch again and again.

Summer lovin’, happened so fast… This from the puckered mouth of Chelsea’s chief suit, Peter Kenyon: “I don’t know what they [City] are offering but I’m confident John is going to remain with us. John is a talisman, he’s the heart of Chelsea, he came through our academy, he’s our captain and he’s also become […]

La Gazzetta dello Sport claims that a delegation from Liverpool has arrived in Rome this morning to offer around €16m for the services of Alberto Aquilani. The highly rated Italian playmaker is a potential replacement for Xabi Alonso, who seems intent on a switch to Real Madrid.

Textbook counter-attack topped off with a sparkling finish. Shame about Paraiba’s horror hair though.

Liverpool drew a blank in the opening match of their pre-season tour of Switzerland and Austria. The result won’t bother Rafa Benitez, who fiddled extensively with his line-up - he made 11 substitutions at half-time! – and also had to make do without his Spanish contingent (still on holiday after the exertions of the Confederations Cup). […]

Like a Geoff Thomas shot, musical parodies often miss the mark – but this works perfectly, not just because Mark Viduka’s name fits the chorus to Leonard Cohen’s ‘Hallelujah’ perfectly, but because it’s funny that anyone would choose such an inconsistent, mercurial player as Viduka to song-worship.

By the power of Greyskull, who the hell is this? (Click image to enlarge). If you think you know, leave a comment with your answer. Yesterday’s answer: Florent Malouda Yep, it was little Malouda. Well done to those of you who didn’t fall for my cunning Ashley Cole-shaped trap.

Just picked this up from one of the sports journos I follow on Twitter (Steve Anglesey @ the Mirror) and thought you should hear it too: Gary Neville alleged to have introduced Mickey Owen to Danny Wellbeck at Carrington thus: “This is Danny. He’s 18 and HE’S won the league.” Ha, that would be just […]

John Terry, aged 19, in action for Nottm Forest in April 2000. [Photo: PA] Aw, bless - look at his gormless chav face. Sweet. Mr JT spent a brief period on loan at Forest in 2000 - it certainly looks strange to see him in a red shirt.

Rather than hire a sexy beauty queen to show off your new kit (as Linfield did), West Ham Utd turned to celeb fan Ray Winstone (aka Ray, 52, from Essex) to show off its new Umbro home kit (that or Matty Upson really piled on the pounds)… Ray told WHTV: “This is beautiful, it is […]

The hair, the hair! Got a Shit Lookalike for Pies? Email me with your shout. Thanks for all of the ones you guys have already sent in. I will get around to posting up the best ones in the next couple of weeks. But keep ‘em coming…

Crouchinho, an artist’s impression… @ Fulham: @ Sunderland: @ Spurs: (Yes, my PhotoShop skills are strong today.) I’ve read reports that Sunderland have agreed a £12m fee with Pompey for Crouchy. I’ve also heard that the player himself would rather go to Fulham or Spurs, but that Fulham might not be able to match his […]

Emmanuel Adebayor is off to Man City, barring a problem with his work permit; and as that wasn’t a problem for him when he joined Arsenal, it should be fine this time around. Arsenal will get around £25m for the striker, which seems like a fair price. I think Adebayor has the potential to be […]

Danny Dichio now plays for Toronto FC in MLS. He is a cult hero of Toronto’s fans, much as he was at QPR, Sunderland and indeed most of the clubs he’s played for. That’s how Danny rolls - fans love his whole-hearted play, which he combines with a large dollop of humility. He’s made the most […]