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Who ate all the pies

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If you are going to cry this Christmas why not shed tears Gazza-style in this Italia 90 retro England shirt. Relive the days when the England national team could not only qualify for major tournaments, but reach the semi-finals of World Cups.

Two Finnish blondes with spiky hair and – as is the way with any sportsmen from Iceland – ice in their veins. Shit huh.

Roque Santa Cruz The Paraguayan gets the pity vote. It is not too often you are a hat-trick hero and end up on the losing team.

The best posts from our club Pies sites today… Should Spurs fans still hate Sol Campbell? Play the Fantasy Fergie Challenge Liverpool’s spy in Manchester checks out the opposition What sort of welcome should Ashley Cole expect at Arsenal? Would Andriy Shevchenko dress up as a whoopee cushion?

Fabio Capello and Marcel Desailly celebrate after AC Milan’s stunning 4-0 victory against Barcelona in the 1994 Champions League final. Photo Bongarts/Getty Images

Something for you to put into action over the weekend…


The Fiendish Friday Quiz

December 14th, 2007

1 SC Braga, Benfica, Chelsea, Lyon, Juventus (current). Whose career?
2 Blackburn’s Christopher Samba plays for which international team?
3 Which is the smallest stadium (in terms of capacity) in the Premier League?
4 Georgi Kinkladze, John Harkes, Fabrizio Ravanelli, Archie Gemmill, Peter Shilton: what links them?
5 Picture round. Who’s this?

This just in from F365: ‘Middlesbrough boss Gareth Southgate has claimed England winger Stewart Downing does not realise how good a player he can be.’
No, but all self-respecting football fans know exactly how good he can be: not very good at all.

099sheva_468x369.jpgChelsea had their Christmas party last night, and as is often the way, it was a fancy-dress affair. John Terry went dressed in an Incredibles superhero outfit, Frank Lampard was kitted out like a 19th century French dandy and Claudio Pizarro looked rather convincing as a Roman Emperor (see pics from the party at the Daily Mail’s website).

Hucks truly is the master of the understatement: ‘I just ran with it, beat a few people and put it in the goal…’

Pies presents the pick of the players from the Champions League group stage who have really caught our eye. That might be because they are world-class players performing at the top of their game or it might be because they made an impression against the odds.

Soccer AM spotted Sky Sports News’ Ian Payne craftily taking off Bo’ Selecta live on air. Announcing that Oldham Athletic’s Craig Davies had found the net proved too tempting an opportunity for Payne to miss.

All is not well with the universe. Supposed runaway champions Lyon suffered a surprise defeat to Caen. Yoan Gouffran’s goal secured victory for the mid-table outfit. Second-placed Nancy managed to close the gap on Lyon to four points, but their 0-0 draw with Valenciennes meant they were not able to fully capitalise on the leaders’ defeat.

Inter Milan are now five points clear at the top of Serie A after thrashing Torino 4-0. Nearest rivals Roma could only manage a 1-1 draw at Liverno allowing third-place Juventus to move within three points of them following the Old Lady’s 1-0 win over Atalanta.

Watford midfielder Al Bangura faces deportation back to his native Sierra Leone after losing his case to stay in the UK at an Asylum and Immigration Tribunal hearing earlier this week. Watford manager Aidy Boothroyd said: ‘We have one young man here [he's 19] who pays his taxes, has a fiancée and a newborn son […]

Please take a couple of minutes out of your day to fill in our lovely reader survey. if you do, you are in with a shout of winning a shiny new Apple iPod Touch 16GB, courtesy of our fwiends at It’s worth £250 but you could net one for nothing. Hmm, I might resign […]

1 Open a very high interest bank account for his £4 million a year salary.
2 Pick a good nickname for himself before the tabloids pick one for him.
3 Impose his expected WAG-ban on England meet-ups.

So, having played just one match each to get to the final, AC Milan will play Boca Juniors in the showpiece of FIFA’s wholly pointless Club World Cup. In front of a lively, 67,000 crowd in Yokohama, Japan, Milan edged a surprisingly tight match. A powerful run by Kaka set up Clarence Seedorf to score […]

624_1.jpgFrom our friends at Spurs Pies, I bring you this impressive rant, posted today. Essential reading for all Tottenham fans:
‘I’m angry today, because for the second time on Spurs Official, the club has posted a story telling us that from January 19 – our home match against Sunderland – a Controlled Parking Zone is coming into effect, which in short will prevent supporters from leaving their cars in around 100 streets near the stadium.

Filmed by some English lads in Chicago. Shameful, blatant, hilarious.

Fabio Capello, England’s new boss if you believe BBC Sport, is not best pleased when Marcelo empties the contents of a drinks bottle over his head. England players, beware. Via Guardian Sport Blog

Arsene let a few of his kids loose at the Emirates last night, and they were just about good enough to defeat a mediocre Bucharest outfit. Theo Walcott missed a few good chances, but Niklas Bendtner scored and seems to be progressing nicely, although I’m not sure he’ll ever be a world beater.

Jonatan Maidana of Boca Juniors and Mahdi Ben Dhifallah of Etoile Sportive du Sahel compete for the ball during the FIFA Club World Cup semi final match between Boca Juniors and Etoile Sportive du Sahel at the National Stadium on December 12, 2007 in Tokyo, Japan. Photo Koichi Kamoshida/Getty Images

Harvey Price’s football connections were never in doubt what with his dad being Dwight Yorke and his mum carrying a couple of footballs round in her bra. As if that wasn’t enough, he also bears a passing resemblence to Hedwiges Maduro, the Ajax midfielder who (as far as we know) is not the son of Dwight Yorke.

This was the world-class player Chelsea signed for all those millions. What happened?