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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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old%20man%20football.jpgPies presents eleven players who were given names more suited to the pension queue than the Premier League:

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Lyon have been confirmed as champions of Ligue 1 by the coach of their nearest rivals. In the wake Lyon’s emphatic 5-0 win over Strasbourg and his side’s 2-1 defeat at Le Mans, Nancy coach Pablo Correa said: “Obviously, we can’t catch them now. I never thought we could anyway.”

As promised yesterday, part two of our top football moments of this year continues below… (check out part one) 10 Ricardinho’s worst corner ever Hilarious proof that even Brazilian footballers aren’t infallible when it comes to a good blooper. Read the rest of the list after the click…

1 Hartlepool United, Liverpool, West Ham, Sheffield United, Everton, Sunderland, West Ham, Millwall, Coventry City, Luton Town (current). Whose career? 2 Only two players have scored for both Liverpool and Everton in the Merseyside derby. David Johnson and who else? 3 Sports Minister Richard Caborn supports which English club? 4 At what stage of the […]

78246212.jpgThe Guardian has a story today that made me chuckle: Rafa Benitez has apparently told his Liverpool players that they can’t stay up until the small hours to watch Ricky Hatton’s boxing title fight against Floyd Mayweather – the fight is scheduled to begin at 4am this Sat/Sun morning. Spoilsport!

‘I played for four years in Belgium and they hate me!’ Didier Zakora, Spurs midfielder Zakora, not the most popular player in Belgium for some reason, was apparently hit by a cigarette lighter thrown from the crowd and had to receive treatment. Paul Robinson picked up a metal bar from the pitch and handed it […]

March 1995 A knackered-looking Steve Bruce tries to keep up with Robbie Fowler during the Premiership match between Liverpool and Man Utd at Anfield in the 1994/95 season. Photo Shaun Botterill/ALLSPORT

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Colchester United have taken extreme measures to encourage fans to comply with no-smoking legislation. The club’s stadium announcer has been threatening supporters tempted by a crafty fag that they will be forced to listen to the music of Will Young.

He has been dubbed football’s answer to Billy Elliott and a Napoleon Dynamite lookalike. Blackburn’s mystery male cheerleader is known only as ‘Andrew’. He has developed a cult internet following after his appearance on Match of the Day at the weekend. Here he is dancing his socks off during Rovers’ match against Aston Villa.

Cristiano Ronaldo indulges in a spot of fancy Dan-ing on the set of a Pro Evo photoshoot only to be shown up by a teaboy with skills!

It’s the end of the year, so, as the rules of modern journalism dictate, here is an end-of-year list. I hope you have five minutes to read Pies’ favourite football moments from 2007 – no doubt there are loads of moments that you remember that don’t make this list; post an angry comment if that is […]

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Inter Milan and Roma have made a break at the top of Serie A after winning games in hand last night. Top of the table Inter followed up victory at Fiorentina at the weekend with a 3-0 win over Lazio. And Roma but themselves five points clear of third-place Juventus with victory over Cagliari. In the weekend’s big match Juve drew 0-0 with AC Milan.

South America – a continent where skills and flair are appreciated and admired. Or not. A match in Peru had to be abandoned after Ancash player Efrain Viafara sparked a brawl by controlling the ball with his backside. His slice of cheek is in the video below.

Wayne Rooney is good mates with Ricky Hatton, despite the fact that Hatton is a massive Man City fan and Roo plays for United – their friendship conquers such tribal divisions. Rooney, who has carried Hatton’s world title belt to the ring before, is absolutely desperate to attend his mate’s fight against Floyd Mayweather in […]

May 1998 Emmanuel Petit and manager Arsene Wenger celebrate winning the championship after the FA Premiership match against Everton at Highbury. Arsenal won 4-0 to secure the title. Photo Shaun Botterill/Allsport

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Tramps Profit hungry New Zealanders are flogging food scraps that David Beckham left behind during his trip to the country on the internet. Fans have put items including a half-empty Coca Cola bottle on auction site TradeMe to cash-in on Becks’ leftovers.

Damn, why didn’t I think of this? Fanbanta has created a WAGvent calendar – see what they did there? – to celebrate the festive season. It’s like an advent calendar, but with pictures of sexy WAGs behind each door, rather than cheap chocolate. And that has to be a good thing, no? Click here to see […]

This spoof video perfectly demonstrates the frustrations experienced by a Football Manager addict. The German kid has made the mistake over accepting the job as Bradford City boss. Sit back and giggle.

120180.gifHow would you like the chance of winning a six-month internship with us at Shiny Media?
Our buddies at LG are running a Video Media Talent Award – a competition to find and train two interns to develop skills in presenting or filming/editing with Shiny Media – the UK’s leading video blogging team.

‘Both readers of this blog will have noted the lame gag we used after United drew Aston Villa in the third round of the FA Cup for the fourth time in seven seasons – namely that the FA must have their balls glued together. Well while that might not be the case – although we […]

A red sash on a white background – River Plate’s kit’s is beautifully simple and instantly recognisable. Now why didn’t I think of that? Peru’s national team has a very similar kit. Buy a Seventies River Plate kit online

Marvel at the sheer range of goals MvB scored during his relatively short career. He really was the complete centre-forward: a ruthless finisher, as good with his head as his feet, fast enough (especially in his head) to get the better of most defenders… there wasn’t much he didn’t do to a world-class standard.

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Ajax lost for the first time this season in a shock 1-3 home defeat against NAC Breda. Klaas-Jan Huntelaar’s last-minute consolation was not enough to spare their blushes. A Jan Vertonghen own goal, and goals from Matthew Amoah and Ahmed Ammi secured the win for NAC.

Of course John Terry wants Mourinho to be the next England boss. They enjoyed great success together at Chelsea, and hugged frequently, in a mannish, completely non-homoerotic fashion. Do you want Mourinho though? He would be a better bet than Steve McClaren, for sure, but I worry that he’d get bored with a job that […]