Christoph Metzelder holds up his new shirt beside Real Madrid president Ramon Calderon (right) and club legend Alfredo di Stefano (left) during his presentation by Real Madrid at the Bernabeu on July 11, 2007. The German centre-back was signed by Real on a free after being out of contract with Borussia Dortmund at the end of last season.
[Photo: Denis Doyle/Getty Images]
Barnet host Arsenal in a pre-season friendly this Saturday at 3pm, in a North London clash of the haves and the have-nots. The match is Arsenal’s first competitive game of the new season, so it will be interesting to see what sort of a team Arsene Wenger chooses to field. I’d imagine he’ll ring the changes and make as many substitutions as possible.
It’s July 11. We are juggernauting towards the new season like Ronaldo towards a buffet. And Jose Mourinho has decided it is time to get the Mind Games 2007-08 under way. The Special One has not fulfilled his quote quota over the last couple of months, but has sprung back into life with his latest offering.
We showed you the new Nike advert in which Wayne Rooney demonstrates his lack of ability to draw a circle, but makes up for it with a scorching volley. Well quicker than you can say ‘day do doe don’t dee do’, Nike have followed it up with this ad. This time Wazza sees himself paired up with a stereotypical American director with predictable consequences!
Last night’s Copa America semi-final between Uruguay and Brazil was a tense enough affair. So pity the poor BBC journalist who dreamt he had sat through a tense 30-minute period of extra-time too. Copa America 2007 matches go straight to penalties without extra-time, and yet the BBC report claims a ‘tense’ spell of extra-time took place in which neither side could ‘conjure up a breakthrough’. I don’t think either side could be criticised for failing to find the net in someone else’s subconscious!
Brazil are through to the final of Copa America 2007. But they need penalties to see of Uruguay after a 2-2 draw. Maicon put Brazil in front before Diego Forlan equalised. Julio Baptista put Brazil back in the lead, but Sebastian Abreu pegged them back once again. The game went to a penalty shootout, which Brazil won 5-4.
The UK property market has been overinflated for some time now. The football transfer market seemed to have calmed down a bit. Until now that is. Wigan have spent Â£5.3 million on the living football legend that is Jason Koumas. For that money you could buy a luxury four-bedroom penthouse apartment in Mayfair and still have enough change for a decent motor. Why would you spend that much on Jason Koumas?!! So Pies is asking, would you rather spend your money on Koumas or the flat?
Last week we took a look back at the greatest ever foreign players to grace the Premiership, but you can be sure that for every Bergkamp there’s a Boogers who’s just as rememberedâ€¦but for all the wrong reasons.
Yes, it’s not some elaborate wind-up, David Beckham really is going to Los Angeles to play for one of MLS’s weakest teams. Yay! And here’s a pic of him in the Galaxy’s new home kit, which looks not unlike the kit he wore for several seasons in Madrid. Not too late to back out though Daveâ€¦
I know Man Utd fans don’t always come from Manchester, but this is ridiculous. Vinnie Jones makes the least convincing Manc of all time. Taken from the movie Eurotrip, which, if this clip is anything to go by, is a steaming pile of dog shit.
Craig Bellamy, Lee Bowyer, Lucas Neill, Anton Ferdinand, Nigel Quashie, Carlton Cole, Roy Carroll, Scott Parker (just for his squeaky voice)â€¦ surely West Ham now have the most irritating set of players in the history of the Premiership? Just as well they got rid of Nigel Reo-Coker, or the Premier League may well have judged them too damn annoying to remain in the top flight.
And about time tooâ€¦ so Chelsea have finally completed the signing of Florent Malouda from Lyon, on a four-year contract. The 27-year-old French international has moved to Stamford Bridge for an undisclosed fee. Malouda will join Chelsea in the US for their pre-season tour, which includes a match against LA Galaxy.
Apologies for the terrible extended headline, but, hey, we kinda liked it. Here’s a pic of Craig Bellamy, signed this week by West Ham, with Lee Bowyer, during a training session with the Hammers. Bellamy and Bowyer, what a charming combination!
[Photo: Paul Gilham/Getty Images]
Watching England’s national team has often made Pies want to throw itself of the top of the stadium, but this Argentina fan does it after victory just to get a sniff of Lionel Messi’s sweaty feet. Messi gives the girl a hug and gets on with it. If Pies was ever going to do something like this it would develop a crush on Frank Lampard – at least he could cushion the fall a bit!
Word up, Pies posse. This week’s Tuesday 10 celebrates rapping footballers. We really shouldn’t be able to compile a list this lengthy but, alas, we can and we have. Shout out to John Barnes – grandfather of the UK football/hip-hop scene!
Japan coach Ivica Osim had his interpreter crying like a baby as he delivered a post-match rollicking following a 1-1 draw with Qatar in their Asian Cup opener. Celtic midfielder Shunsuka Nakamura revealed that Osim was not best pleased after his side conceded a late equaliser.
Cristiano Ronaldo was on hand to announce one of the new Seven Wonders of the World at a ceremony in Lisbon at the weekend. The Manchester United winger announced (after staring gormlesly into space for a few seconds) that Chichen Itza pyramid in Mexico had been selected.
Liverpool have apparently made a bid for Dutch U-21 star Ryan Babel. The Ajax forward is rated as the brightest young prospect in Dutch football by none other than Marco van Basten and has already been linked to Arsenal and Newcastle – whadyareckon?
Pies’ favourite nutcase Moritz Volz, the wackiest player in the Prem, has been taking in the tennis at Wimbledon. As per usual, this was an excellent opportunity for an exciting entry in the Fulham man’s online diary (one day this will be printed and become a bestseller, Pies is sure). And, as per usual, the diary entry was packed with the kind of crazy quotes we have come to expect from the German.
Real Madrid legend Alfredo di Stefano (left) and gobby president Ramon Calderon (right) welcome new coach Bernd Schuster to the club at the official photo-call at the Bernabeu (Photo by Carlos Alvarez/Getty Images).
Former German international Bernd Schuster is the latest man to be handed the poisoned chalice that is the Real Madrid coach’s job. The 48-year-old has left mid-table Getafe to take over at the Bernabeu, where winning the league gets you the sack.