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Who ate all the pies

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1 Losing to a Championship side is the perfect way to get your team prepared to play one of the best team’s in Europe.
2 Although it does help if they play most of the match with 10 men. Marco Materazzi’s first yellow was perhaps a little harsh but having picked it up he cannot complain about his second.
3 The referee hadn’t really intended to send Materazzi off. His body language as it dawned on him that this was Matrix’s second bookable offence was hilarious. “Oops, I already

Liverpool vs Inter (Anfield 7.45pm) A massive night for Liverpool, and especially for beleaguered boss Rafa Benitez. The Spaniard has been publicly backed by ‘Pool’s US owners, at least until the end of the season, but I still think there’s an outside chance that he could be sacked if Inter win – and win convincingly […]

Pies puts out a team of Premier League pension dodgers. Old heads might come in handy in the dressing room, but this lot have a combined age of 392!
Jens Lehmann (Arsenal, aged 38)
The Gunners old timer spends lots of his time sitting on benches and loves nothing better than a good moan.

A backheeled nutmeg (even if it was unintentional) to beat two defenders, followed by a strong run and clinical finish? Yes, it’s easy to see why so many people are raving about Lyon’s young striker, Kazim Benzema. A note of caution: the defending in the French top flight is considerably more forgiving than in the […]

June 1994 Alexi Lalas shows off a hand-drawn gift received from a fan after the USA’s World Cup victory over Colombia at the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, California. The U.S. won the game 2-1. Photo Mike Powell /Allsport


The Tuesday Teaser

February 19th, 2008

Three footballers, each one represented by a set of photo clues. Guess who they are (answers after the click). Lateral thinking required… 1. 2. 3.

Thanks to our friends at The Spoiler for this tremendous spot. Rafa’s working the Blue Steel, or is it Le Tigre? Or Magnum perhaps? I don’t know – they all look the same. Anyhoo, maybe after tonight, when Inter beat Liverpool, Rafa will need to find work as a male model.

Cruzeiro’s Kerlon Moura Souza is the latest player to be labeled ‘the next Ronaldinho’. The young Brazilian is famed for his so-called ‘seal dribble’ – running past players while bouncing the ball on his forehead.
Although, like with Nani, his opponents are less than impressed…

79796904.jpgArsenal exposed themselves as bad losers again after their FA Cup slaughtering at the hands of Man United. Wenger complained about the state of the pitch, Emanuel Eboue was sent off for a late challenge on Evra and several players had a kick at Nani for his impromptu ‘seal impression’.

Saturday’s FA Cup to lower league Barnsley was another nail in Rafa Benitez’s coffin. Liverpool’s season is virtually dead and buried now unless the Spaniard can ressurect them for another Champions League miracle – starting against Inter tonight.

Three Luca Toni goals in the space of 24 minutes gave Bayern Munich victory at Hannover. The win maintained Bayern’s three-point lead at the top of the table with rivals Werder Bremen also picking up three points from their match against Nuremburg. Markus Rosenberg and Ivan Klasnic goals gave Werder a 2-0 win.

England manager Fabio Capello arrives on the red carpet at the Laureus World Sports Awards in St.Petersburg, Russia.

Talk about talent, this kid’s got bags of it. The aerial prowess of Tim Cahill and the temperament of Zinedine Zidane.

Welcome to Who Ate All the Pies’ list of the best 20 teenage footballers in the world. You will have heard of some of them, but watch out for all these kids – they have the world at their feet…
20. Sadick Adams
Nationality: Ghanaian, Club: Atletico Madrid, Age: 18

Ghana is now producing some of the finest football talent in the world, and Sadick Adams is one of its most exciting Black Starlets. He was snapped up by Atletico Madrid after his impressive showing for Ghana at the Fifa U17 World Cup last year, when he scored four goals in the tournament, including one against Spain in their semi final. He’s a striker blessed with explosive pace and remarkable athleticism, although his lack of height (he’s 5ft 6in) may put off the biggest clubs.
The rest of the list after the click…

Thanks to Pies reader nahim1989 for this fine submission. I have never watched Naruto: Shippuden, but according to Nahim it is ‘wildy popular’.

Rene Higuita, the goalkeeper famous for his huge perm, wandering ways and Scorpion Kick, has returned to his native Colombia at the age of 41 to sign for second-division side Deportivo Rionegro. According to, ‘Higuita spent 2007 playing for Guaros de Lara in Venezuela under Colombian coach Jaime De La Pava after returning to […]

A big thanks to all Pies fans who voted for us in Soccerlens’ football blog awards. We came out on top in their Best Overall Blog category, which I guess is a bit like winning Best Film at the Oscars, except without the gold statuette or Jack Nicholson sat in the front row with that […]

Liverpool players stretch in front of the Kop during a training session held at Anfield on 18 February, 2008, ahead of tomorrow’s crucial Champions League first-leg against Inter. Photo Alex Livesey/Getty Images

I always like to see one of the big four taken down a peg, and so I smiled when both Arsenal and Liverpool crashed out of the FA Cup at the weekend. The manner of their defeats was very different. The Gooners might have expected to lose at Old Trafford, but even their fans must […]

The full draw for this season’s FA Cup quarter finals: Sheffield United or Middlesbrough v Cardiff City Manchester United v Portsmouth Bristol Rovers v West Brom Barnsley v Chelsea First reaction: I would have loved to see Man Utd and Chelsea drawn together, as Alex Ferguson mischievously predicted would happen, but overall I think this […]

Barcelona won 1-2 in Zaragoza while Real Madrid lost by the same margin against Real Betis to narrow the gap at the top. Ronaldinho’s 83rd minute penalty secured victory for Barca after Thierry Henry had earlier opened the scoring. Royston Drenthe put Real Madrid 1-0 up after six minutes against Real Betis, but a quickfire first-half double from Edu and Mark Gonzalez meant defeat for the league leaders.

This video shows Manchester United’s Nani showing off his circus tricks against Arsenal. Unsurprisingly the Arsenal players start to get a teeny bit frustrated.

Frank Lampard scored his 100th goal for Chelsea during their FA Cup win over Huddersfield. First and foremost, that vest must be minging because his 99th goal came back in December. Secondly, who was Frank making the dedication to?

Brian Howard The Barnsley skipper’s late winner gave his side a shock 1-2 win against Liverpool at Anfield (in case you hadn’t heard).

The lovely bloggers at Soccerlens have been generous enough to shortlist Who Ate All the Pies in the category of Best Overall Footy Blog in their blog awards. Please – pretty please, with sugar on top – head over there and VOTE FOR US! PS. I love you all. Did I ever tell you that? […]