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Who ate all the pies

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barwick%20england%20manager%20capello.JPGIt is good to know that Brian Barwick’s root-and-branch reform of the FA hasn’t managed to remove any of the organisation’s notorious leaks. Pies can say this with some confidence because this morning every man and his dog knows that at around lunchtime today that same Mr Barwick is due to pull a piece of expensive FA cloth from over the top of a Fabio Capello-shaped object in Soho Square to reveal that Fabio Capello is the new England manager.

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Ajax found the perfect way to bounce back from their first league defeat of the season. A 2-3 win at Willem II, PSV Eindhoven’s shock defeat at home to Roda JC and Feyenoord’s 0-0 draw with VVV Venlo meant Ajax moved back to the top of the Eredivisie.

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It sounds very much like Brian Barwick would like to get into bed with Fabio Capello (strictly FA business, you understand). Capello has had talks with the FA today and is expected to be confirmed as the new England boss by the end of the week. We won’t count our chickens just yet (because these things can change in the time it takes to say Big Phil Scolari) but do you think Capello is the right man for the job?

Apparently, David Wheater gets an extra push to tear through Ronaldo when you are behind him. There is a scary thought! This email viral has been sent to Boro fans by local boy David Wheater to inject some passion into the Riverside and specifically put some bums on the empty seats in the Riverside.

Sublime instinctive skill from Beckford. The 24-year-old striker is very talented, but also very inconsistent. If he could repeat moments of magic like this on a more regular basis, who knows how far he could go?

This photo was taken during yesterday’s Bayern Munich training session, ahead of the club’s Uefa Cup clash with Aris Salonica. Kahn looks happy, doesn’t he? He’s also starting to look every one of his 38 years… and then some. Photo Getty Images

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No.1 Claudio Pizarro (pictured) is not a world-class striker. He’s more a Derby County-class striker. He could have had a hat-trick but missed several good chances that team-mate Didier Drogba – who is a world-class striker – would surely have put away. Chelsea should ditch Pizarro in the Jan. transfer window.
No.2 Valencia are seriously shit.

No.1 Playing in black suits Liverpool, it seems. Playing in peach-and-sky blue definitely does not suit Marseille. One look at the respective kits of both teams, even before the match had kicked off, told me that Liverpool would win. That and the fact they have much better players. No.2 I never thought I’d say it, […]

This American youngster has been banned from playing for his high school football team for getting a mohawk haircut (and not a very good one). Apparently the soccer field is not the place for individuality.

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Having whipped Australia and New Zealand into a frenzy during his LA Galaxy’s recent tour, David Beckham has now turned his attention to housewives the world over (we might as well take this opportunity to offer a firendly ‘welcome to Pies’ to the hundreds of bored housewives who have landed on this page directly from a Google search!).

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Marseille 1-2 Liverpool I agree with Alan Hansen that Liverpool will sneak the win they need to qualify for the next stage.

Games

The Tuesday Teaser

December 11th, 2007

Guess the three footballers from each set of picture clues (click to enlarge)… EASY MEDIUM HARD

The first in a new series that celebrates forgotten wonder goals recalls Erik Edman’s thunderous, out-of-character strike for Spurs against Liverpool in April 2005. Edman, a full-back, currently plays for Rennes in France. He hasn’t yet scored for them.

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Bayern Munich couldn’t find the net but the four goals scored by Hannover were enough to keep the Bavarians top of Bundesliga. Bayern played out a 0-0 draw against Duisburg, but nearest rivals Werder Bremen were defeated in a 4-3 thriller at Hannover.

The manager from Portugal, he say no.
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The only people who seemed to think that Mourinho might say yes were the tabloid media (Sun, Mirror, Sky etc.) who fabricated the story in the first place – because they are acutely aware that Jose gives good copy. Now the gutter press will refocus their unrelenting spotlight on Fabio Capello, and no doubt put him off the job in the same way they did with Felipe Scolari.

Who would have thought that a five-minute video of one footballers’ assists from crosses could be so interesting. But this highlights reel of is utterly fascinating – it’s easy to forget just how deadly Beckham was for Man Utd out on the right wing. No wonder Dwight Yorke and Andy Cole, neither of whom were world-class […]

Marvel at the versatility of David’s tresses. Via The Offside

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And you thought Steve McClaren would never win any silverware! The former England coach has picked up the Plain English Campaign’s annual foot in mouth award.

Nothing new there, you might think. The interesting difference on this occasion is that it has emerged that Benitez himself has given the video a critique after [EGO ALERT] searching for himself on YouTube.

December 1998 A parachutist in a Santa Claus costume is stretchered away after crashing into the Trinity Road Stand during his descent, breaking both his legs and falling 100 feet onto the perimeter track during halftime in the FA Carling Premiership match between Aston Villa and Arsenal at Villa Park. Photo Clive Brunskill /Allsport

The perils of being a cameraman at a live sporting event… Anyone know which country this might have come from? Australia maybe?

The awful behaviour of Emmanuel Eboue got me thinking: Which player are you embarrassed to see wearing the beloved shirt of the team you support? As a Spurs fan, I’d nominate Hossam Ghaly, who doesn’t seem to value the Tottenham shirt at all – the fact he’s shit doesn’t help. Nominations please…

This video rather neatly wraps up some of the funniest own goals into a handy five-minute video.

Urawa Red Diamonds celebrate after defeating Iran’s Sepahan in their FIFA Club World Cup match at Aichi’s Toyota Stadium on December 10, 2007. Urawa’s 3-1 win saw them progress to the semi finals, where they meet AC Milan; the European champions have been given a bye into the last four. Photo Koji Watanabe/Getty Images

20060626113026.jpgAlan Hansen is about the only decent football pundit the BBC has, and he’s been doing the job for more than a decade; Mark Lawrenson is a poor man’s Hansen, but he’s not as bad as the rest of them, who make up a sorry collection of the bland – Lee Dixon and Gavin Peacock, to name two charisma-free ex-players – and the incompetent.