The rumour: Wigan Athletic want to sign Chilean defender Waldo Ponce. That is all you need to know.
The truth: Waldo Ponce is possibly the greatest footballer’s name ever. Either that or Socrates. Please Roberto, can you fix it for him to come to the Premier League, so I can come up with a sickening glut of Ponce-related headlines. Thanks.
PS. I couldn’t find any decent high-res images of Waldo, so instead enjoy this gratuitous paparazzi shot of namesake Lola Ponce, an Argentine actress/model/singer: