So It Begins: Dani Alves Would Love To Sign Jack Wilshire For Barcelona

Chris Wright

19th, February 2013


By Chris Wright

“Wilshere is a great player who we have met playing against Arsenal and without doubt he can reach the height of the players we have here at Barcelona like Xavi and Iniesta.

“He has a lot of quality and a great personality. If I was given the chance to choose, he is a player that I would sign for Barcelona.”

The words, there, of Barcelona’s premier Quark impersonator and right-back Dani Alves.

*Tap tap tap*

Wilshere lives and breaths Arsenal and signed a bumper new contract last year therefore it’s almost entirely certain he won’t be going anywhere soon, but you all know the drill by now:

One of Barca’s interchangeable talking heads dims the lights, scatters a few rose petals, lights some scented candles, spritzes the air with Sex Panther, reclines on the bed and starts gently purring his ‘come hither’ sweet nothings while the dulcet tones of ‘The Very Best of Michael Bolton’ work their seductive magic in the background.

It starts as nothing more than a mention in passing but soon you’ve got great globs of Barca DNA all over your nice clean sheets.

Dirty buggers.

Posted in Arsenal, Barcelona, Newsnow, Transfers & Rumours

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  1. shaunny72 says:

    ‘Tap Tap Tap’ my words excatly.
    Stop pimping our players. F#@* off Barca !!!!

  2. paul says:

    because arsenal have never tapped anyone up…

    besides, they hardly need wilshere. they’ve got a production line of players like that. their b and c sides are full of wilshere types who have the advantage of being homegrown and entrenched in the barca style.

    wilshere’s the only english player who is remotely comparable to any of the spanish stars so the english press are creaming themselves over him. stick him in the spanish or italian league and he’d be one of many.

  3. […] View original article. /* This entry was posted in Arsenal and tagged Arsenal, Best, Given, Rose, Wilshere by admin. Bookmark the permalink. […]

  4. Hootie says:

    I think this is useless. Alves said the same thing about Neymar recently, too. Besides, when would Wilshire ever get a game? He has skills, but more than, say, Thiago? Remember, Cesc is pining for minutes this season.

  5. @OldNumber7Shirt says:

    hey Dani Alves. f*ck off. you and yer mum.

    Barca gets not even a text from us ’til they pay the remainder for Cesc and Song. Especially after their dickishness about the whole David Villa affair. But considering his frail health, maybe they did us a favor.

    And it needs also to be said that for all the tuggies Barca receives for having a marvelous youth program in La Masia, they have the highest wage bill of any team in ALL OF WORLD SPORT. no secret special formula there, they just shell out cash for wins.

    once the bottom falls out – whenever that is – I suspect we’ll be floored at the level of plasticity in Barca’s fan base. Sure, there are die-hards. They’re just 1 in every 1,000.

  6. Àl says:

    @ Hootie – I don’t think Neymar is a good example as a lot of journalists reckon he’s nailed on for Barca, think there may even be an agreement in place so maybe Alves has a crystal ball

  7. Si says:

    @OldNumber7Shirt – if Barca come a-knocking, Arsenal would not stand a chance. The two clubs do not compare – Barca are light years ahead of the present day Arsenal.

    Saying that Barca “buy wins” reeks of sour grapes. Messi, Xavi, Iniesta, Puyol and others are almost “one club” players. They clearly love the club and, yes, are rewarded well for doing so.

    Regarding the La Masia dig, Barca pay huge wages because they breed superstars who generate huge revenue for the club and have a relatively modest per-player outlay on new players (save for the odd few). It is called incentivisation. They can clearly afford to pay huge sums when they pay very little (if anything) for players of La Masia age who then turn around and help them win everything in sight.

    This is not a complicated concept and it pains me that people, mostly English, are starting to turn on Barca for taking the time to develop (and now profit from) a very prudent footballing (and business) model.

    As a Newcastle fan, I would love it (just love it – apologies, I could not resist) if we had anything resembling La Masia. For all intents and purposes, it is *the* modern footballing model.

    If Arsenal bought Messi, they would have to pay (even being modest) £75m and *then* his salary. It is a financial no-brainer.

    And if you are waiting for the “bottom to fall out” of Barca, you may be waiting a while. They have been like this for the best part of fifteen years and show no signs of slowing down. They are *the* Catalan club and whilst foreign revenue is not insignificant, the lifeblood of the club is based in the country.

  8. Jon says:

    @ Si

    the thing is they don’t have a very prudent business model. their liabilities vastly outweigh their assets and the only reason they can skate by is because of their ridiculous tv deal. madrid and barca are at the 1800s american “robber baron” stage right now.

  9. gvb says:

    wilshire wouldn’t be able to get a start on barca B.

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