Samuel Eto’o On Brink Of Anzhi Switch, Russians Offer Mind-Bogglingly Ma-hoo-sive Contract

Chris Wright

10th, August 2011


By Chris Wright


As you may or may not be aware, Samuel Eto’o is on the brink of signing for Russian club Anzhi Makhachkala (they who currently employ Roberto Carlos and force all their new signings don ‘traditional’ sheepskin carpets and hats), with Massimo Morratti, several Inter execs and the player’s agent all confirming that the move is nearing it’s completion over the course of the past couple of days.

Word on the street this morning is that the deal is set to land Inter somewhere around about the €35 million mark and that Eto’o himself has been offered a colossal, reality-skewing contract that will see him take home approximately £338,000 every seven days for the next four years.

We’ll say that again – £338,000 a week…for the next 1,460-odd days. To put that in some sort of hideous perspective, that’s roughly what your average Dagestan citizen earns in 70 years of graft.

Once again, it’s times like this that we plebs start decrying our utter lack of any semblance of footballing talent and/or cardio-vascular fitness. Bitch bitch, moan moan.

The deal may also prove to be a kick in the nads for Manchester’s United and City – with a big, fat €35 million cheque sitting in their account meaning that Inter will be under considerably less pressure to push through any sale of one Wesley Sneijder – though the Dutchman has, this very morn, fessed up to holding preliminary contract talks with United a couple of weeks ago.

Just saying.