Horror Hair: Marouane Chamakh, Arsenal

Ollie Irish

16th, September 2010


By Ollie Irish

Two words: Geek Pie. Two words which will mean nothing to you unless you’ve watched a certain episode of Chris Morris and Charlie Brooker’s ‘Nathan Barley’, but still… Geek Pie.

I imagine a conversation between Marouane and his hair stylist, if indeed he has one:

“So, Marouane, what can I do for you today?”

“I’d like a mini mullet at the back, and keep it long in patches on the top. Oh, and slick it down with jizz when you’re done – but leave some bits spiked up. Oh, and can you do it blindfold?”

“Of course… going anywhere nice in the Champions League this year?”

Camp Drog says:

“Ooh, it’s a tonsorial disgrace!”