14 Of The Finest Retro ‘Player-Affiliated’ Football Computer Games

Chris Wright

31st, July 2013


By Chris Wright

Having had numero uno on this list bought to our attention by the great @James_Dart this morning, we thought we’d compile a little run-down of the 14 finest/utterly baffling/largely crap retro football computer games that the pros have put their names to over the years.

Let’s start where we mean to begin…

14. Edgar Davids Street Soccer

We’ve never played it, but anything with an isometric view gets an immediate down-vote from Pies…


13. John Barnes European Football

Stubble in 16-bit…

john barnes

12. Graham Taylor’s Soccer Challenge

We can only assume the challenge was to work out what Graham’s facial expression was supposed to be…


11. Kenny Dalglish Soccer Manager


The game featured top tips like this…


10. Graeme Souness Vector Soccer

Complete with 100% officially licensed moustache…


Ever the modernist, Souey also had an accompanying manager sim too…


9. Pele’s Soccer

<Insert some kind of “floppy disk” quip here>…


8. Emilio Butragueno Football

Well, at least Emilio looks happy with it…


7. The Gary Lineker Collection



The 1992 Kixx compendium included “Italy 1990”, “Hot Shot”, “Superstar Soccer” and “Super Skills”, the latter being a training sim which saw the player “help Gaz limber up in his private gymnasium” with press-ups, squat thrusts, weight-lifting and professional hydration management….


What fun!

6. Gazza’s Super Soccer

Had this little beaut on the Amiga. Totally crap game compounded by the fact that the pitch automatically switched from horizontal to vertical view as you made your way up-field, meaning you simply ran the ball out for throw-ins every time you launched an attack…


Fear ye not, for there was a sequel…


5. David O’Leary Manager 2000

O’Leary at the peak of his powers…

4. Emlyn Hughes International Soccer

For reasons unbeknownst, Emlyn’s foray into football gaming also produced a spin-off Arcade Quiz game too…


3. Chris Kamara’s Street Soccer

True story: I bought this utter abortion from the bargain bin at Michaelwood services on the M1 and it was quite possibly the worst £7.50 I’ve ever spent…


2. Ally McCoist Director of Football

Even if it’s only half as much fun as the box suggests then you’re in for a hoot!


1. Sean Dundee’s World Club Football

Wait…what? Why and how did this ever happen?

sean dundee

Brilliant stuff, and so many rubbish, rubbish memories! Any more terrible football games you wish to give a timely nod? Let’s hear ’em…