Horror Hair: Swansea’s New Signing Roque Mesa Just Looks Awful Across The Board (Photo)

Chris Wright

6th, July 2017



Photo: @SwansOfficial/Twitter

He may have the look of a veteran sicario for a Colombian drug cartel, but the man you see before you is actually Swansea City’s latest summer acquisition.

Roque Mesa is his name, central-midfielding is his game and he last found gainful employ at La Liga side Las Palmas.

Señor Table also boasts some of the worst facial accoutrements we’ve seen since one Joseph Barton attempted to grow a herbaceous border on his upper lip…

Mesa does, however, at least have an excuse – though it is decidedly flimsy.

After sealing his £11million move to the Liberty Stadium, the 28-year-old explained his appearance to the Swans official website:

It’s a small promise with my wife because I told her I wouldn’t shave my moustache until I get called up by the Spanish national team.

What started as a story has become a part of my personal image and nowadays I have it as a part of my image.

Something tells us he might be waiting a while longer.

And don’t even get us started on the blow-back curtains currently perched atop of his head.

Posted in Horror Hair, Swansea City

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  1. Carl S. says:

    I just want to say what a magnificent piece of writing this was. Eloquent as can be. Bravo!

  2. VieuxSang says:

    Ladies and thugs wear rocks on their ears. Conspicuous consumption again for these shallow kids.

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