By Chris Wright
If you thought the various retina-pummelling ‘keeper kit designs on show in the Premier League in the early-to-mid 1990s were bile-inducingly vile, then feast your eyes on this little lot. Turns out the Argentinians had it worse. Far worse.
WARNING: Some of these kits are probably best viewed through welding goggles if you happen to enjoy your eyes functioning normally.
Oscar Fernando Passet, San Lorenzo, 1993
Someone phone Medicorp, I think I’m having a seizure…
Roberto Abbondanzieri, Rosario Central, 1994/95
Sadly, the ‘tessellating geckos’ look failed to get off the ground…
Enzo Leonardo Noce, Gimnasia, 1994/95
Someone spiked the Hummel design department’s Orangina again…
Carlos Navarro Montoya, Boca Juniors, 1994/95…
Legendary in ‘Shit Kit’ circles (there’s a little further reading on this self-designed monstrosity available here)…
Gustavo Campagnuolo, Deportivo Español, 1994
Like someone was asked to draw their mental state after a three-day acid binge…
Sergio Goycochea, River Plate, 1993/94
*Gip*
Jose Luis “El Buldog” Chilavert, Velez Sarsfield…
The first professional goalkeeper ever to score a hat-trick (versus Ferro Carril Oeste in 1999) wore the bulldog motif on his chest for most of his Velez career and, to be fair, it’s actually rather cool – but those shoulder pads…good grief man!
Fernando Alvez, San Lorenzo, 1995/96
A classic “I didn’t sign up for this” face if ever we saw one…
Faryd Mondragon, Independiente, 1994/95
Speaking of which…
Happy as Larry!
Now if you’ll excuse us, we have some purging to be getting on with.
(Several images pilfered from our buds over at Old School Panini)