‘He Is A Cheat: He Tugs Your Shirt, Kicks You And Loves To Dive’ – Laurent Koscielny Gives Luis Suarez Both Barrels

Chris Wright

15th, October 2012


By Chris Wright

Arsenal centre-back Laurent Koscielny has been chatting to French footballing tome L’Equipe, who asked him which striker he admired and which he hated playing against most.

After naming the ‘strong’ and ‘good’ Didier Drogba as the opponent who had impressed him the most, Koscielny went a bit ‘balls out of the bath’ with the answer to the second question:

“Who is the forward I hate to face? Suarez. Last season I didn’t feel too well. It was a match at 12.30pm and I don’t like that schedule.

“He is tiresome to defend against. He is a cheat. He pulls your shirt, giving you small kicks all the time. You always want to give him a kick, but you have to be careful not to be red carded.

“For example on September 2nd against Liverpool, it was the case with Luis Suarez. He is a player who likes to dive as soon as there is contact. During a challenge we jostled a bit each other and he fell.

“He started to talk to me in English, to say it was a penalty.”

Drogba, of course, famously never being one to dabble in such fare.

Anyway, his arseholery is a large part of what makes Suarez such a nightmare to play against for defenders. Like many strikers, he is merely taking advantage of his greatest asset, and effectively so.

Peter Crouch stands a clear two-feet above everybody else in the penalty area: he wins headers when balls are arched into the box. Suarez is a conniving troll with absolutely no dignity and/or sense of shame while on the pitch: he wins freekicks in much the same circumstances.

Play to your strengths.

Posted in Arsenal, Liverpool

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  1. James says:

    Why does Gareth Bale not get this kind of press. Is it coz he’s British and therefore ‘doesn’t dive’

  2. Eeny says:

    @James: Because you touch yourself at night.

  3. Stu says:

    I don’t think all the Evra stuff has helped his cause to be fair. Plenty of players dive and get castigated for it, Ashely Young for one. I just think the whole thing that surrounds Suarez is pretty negative, the diving, moaning, racism, he probably drowns puppies too. Shame really as he is actually a tidy player.

    Didn’t Suarez bite someone in the neck when he was at Ajax too?

  4. Joey says:

    @Stu, let’s not forget that hand ball at the world cup, either. He’s a scum bag.

  5. Si says:

    @James – Bale has been all over the press for his alleged dive at the weekend. There’s an entire debate on it on another Pies thread.

    On another note, L’Equipe sounds like a great read. It seems to specialise in getting footballers to slag each other off!

  6. Stiff says:

    @Joey, fuck off with the handball nonsense. Any sane player would’ve done the same.

  7. shay says:

    At least the match officals know his reputation now and it seems like he is even denied clear penalties. Just desserts I’d say.

  8. Gormee says:

    @stiff it’s not just the fact he handled on the line.. You’re prb right to say anyone wld hv done it but only the classless, graceless, cheating, whining, diving, racist Suarez wld celebrate the fact tht he cheated an entire country a legit goal in the WC QF.. It’s not the act but rather the behaviour of the man tht is so deserving of our despise.. Of cos he’s always the victim it’s never his fault eh

  9. Martin says:

    @Gormee please don’t make me laugh, you’re saying that anyone have done what Suarez do against Ghana, but isn’t right to celebrate after? Not for all of you, but I really wish see someday England winning a semifinal or a very important match with an action like that, I wanna see your reaction, cause I smell a lot of hypocrisy in what some people write and talk about Suárez. PD: Excuse me very much for my english, clearly it’s not the best.

  10. Martin says:

    A few days ago Owen told that he dive in the matches against Argentina in France 98 and Corea-Japan 02, is he a cheater? Don’t you celebrate the Sapporo victory? Come on, this is football too… Players like Roy Keane or Charlie Adam, who caused intentionally serious injuries to other players are booed less than those who dive or touch the ball with his hand… What is worst? Who of those examples are more sentenced? It’s fair?

  11. Holand 1945 says:

    To be fair Bale is a cock but he’s a diver, and little else. Suarez also dabbles in additional play-acting, biting, handballing and you know, racism.

  12. Brendan says:

    Poor Koscielny, someone tugged his shirt at work!

  13. Bob says:

    I think Suarez is going to take this really well.

  14. jon says:

    Enough with the WC handball already. He didn’t cheat anyone out of anything. Cheating requires deception. It was the one of the only times he didn’t try to deceive the ref. He and the other defender on the line both jumped with arms extended with clear, obvious intent to block the ball from crossing the line. It was a clear handball, the ref gave him a red card, and Ghana a penalty kick. If you really want to blame someone for Ghana losing, blame Gyan. Make the penalty and it’s a non-issue. As for him celebrating, his team was a penalty away from being eliminated and the guy missed. Why shouldn’t he be happy? He still paid the price for his actions (red card, game suspension).

    Additionally, the run of play before the hand ball was off a free kick, which came from a Ghanian dive.

  15. Milkchew says:

    Shock horror, another article on Pies bad mouthing Suarez. Thank god i was sat down.

  16. Mr. Angry says:

    dont listen to this ugly dragon looking prick kocielny! he’s a cheating little wanker himself!

  17. Jock says:

    All players playing in the prem is a money grabbing, cheating cunt until proven other wise. Notable exceptions?

  18. Drew says:

    @Stiff are you a fucking idiot? Go look at replays… he EASILY could have headed that ball off the line. But he was too much of a pussy to use his head… for once

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