Who Ate All The Pies

It’s hard to recall an English player that is as naturally gifted as Glenn Hoddle. He could do just about anything with a ball, and in the eighties, when this was a rarity, he was a delight to watch. Inside the 18-yard box he was lethal… and was twice as deadly from distance. His goal […]

Michel ‘Mental’ Platini, once one of the greatest players in the universe has failed to impress me with his ideas to make football more beautiful as UEFA President. He’s already said that he’d like a limit of three Champions League places per country, and now the Frenchman has now put forward a proposal for games […]

In what seems like a move in damage limitation, England have scaled down their schedule of friendly matches from 20 to 18 over the four-year period from 2008. Steve ‘Malcolm’ McClaren had made it clear that he was in favour of scrapping some in favour of longer training camps. "I want the flexibility to be […]

In the wake of Bolton’s 3-1 defeat by Arsenal last night, Sam Allardyce couldn’t resist having a pop at referee Chris Foy: ‘There were three bookings in the game and somehow, Tal [Ben Haim] has picked up two of them,’ Sam said. ‘I appreciate he might have pulled Baptista back on the second occasion but […]

Remember LA Galaxy’s open trials to fund David Beckham’s wages with money paid by deluded twentysomethings attract new talent to the club? Well, as if the Beckham media circus wasn’t enough reality TV for the club they now seem to be setting up an X Factor/American Idol-style showdown. The 800 hopefuls have been whittled down […]

Belgian outfit Zulte Waregem are Newcastle’s opponents in the Uefa Cup tonight. Expect them to take to the pitch in this white with red and green trim shirt. Click here to buy it from the official website. Click here to see them in action against Sparta Prague. [Rob Parker]

England boss Steve McClaren has sent out DVDs to all of his team to point out where they went wrong during last week’s defeat to Spain. McClaren and assistant Steve Round have compiled individual DVDs for each player showing how they were partly accountable for the result. He said: "We always give them feedback – […]

Blackburn‘s Uefa Cup opponents Bayer Leverkusen favour this little red number from the house of Adidas. The kit is similar in style to the Germany national kit. The hand that appears to be groping the wearer’s left breast belongs to energy company RWE. You can buy the kit from Kitbag for £44.99 by clicking here. […]

Catania have been ordered to play the remainder of their home games at neutral venues this season after their Massimino stadium was shut down. Italian Judge, Gianpaolo Tosel, gave the ban and stated that the Sicilian club’s responsiblity for the violence that led to the death of policeman Filippo Raciti at the club’s derby against […]

What does everyone make of the latest incident dogging Joey Barton? Man City gaffer Stuart Pearce reckons that the situation is becoming a "witch-hunt", with allegations and finger wagging come from all at Pompey. Twitcher Redknapp claimed that Barton had set out to injure Pedro Mendes in the game at Fratton Park and that anyone […]

Before I start, I’ll apologize to Football365 for blatantly pinching an article from their site. Anyway, on with the news. Samuel Eto’o is a very unhappy man. The world saw Eto’o going mental with the Spanish press after a dispute with Barca manager, Frank Rijkaard. The Dutchman has accused Eto’o of refusing to come on […]

Wigan boss Paul Jewell has announced he will contest a foul and abusive language charge by alleging that referee Phil Dowd is partial to a bit of cursing himself. Jewell will face the FA armed with statements from six of his players claiming that Dowd told them to "F**k off" during the match against Arsenal […]

FIFA is apparently planning yet another clampdown on goal celebrations, which could see tighter restrictions such controversial activities as somersaults, removing the shirt and, erm, ear-cupping! Make the most of these beautiful celebrations while you still can. [Rob Parker]

This compilation selects some of the best goals from around the world from January. Any favourites, Pies fans? [Via 101Greatgoals, Rob Parker]

Chelsea have announced they are to tour China next summer. The trip is seen as an opportunity to increase the Blues’ Asian fanbase and attract young Chinese talent to Stamford Bridge. The tour is the latest stage in the Premiership champions’ partnership with the Chinese FA. The Blues have been hosting China’s Olympic squad at […]

Is it me, or is anyone else annoyed with the mewing coming from Wigan at the minute? It’s all ‘boo-hoo, we’re so hard done to…’ Admittedly, Wigan were unlucky against Arsenal at the weekend, what with penalty decisions not going their way and the referee reportedly swearing at Paul Jewell; they really should have had […]

Gordon Strachan was a tenacious and tricky little player in his day… little being the operative word. Before days of winning the Cup Winners Cup with Aberdeen, and spells at Leeds and ManYoo, the wee man was a rising star at Dundee. Watch him tear apart Abroath with his hair nearly as big as he […]

QPR’s assistant manager, Richard Hill, has been suspended "until further notice" following the brawl during a training match against China’s Olympic team. China player Zheng Tao suffered a broken jaw during the incident at QPR’s training ground on 7 February. The FA is also investigating and is "in ongoing communication with the police". Some QPR […]

Young Plymouth Argyle right-back Dan Gosling has made the papers this morning amid rumours that Jose Mourinho is staring longingly towards Home Park and wishing he could sneak the transfer window back open. Gosling signed his first professional contract earlier this month when he turned 17, which – as the mathematicians among you will have […]

Iron Maiden frontman Bruce Dickenson was the pilot as Rangers flew to Israel for their Uefa Cup tie with Hapoel Tel Aviv. And this wasn’t some cheap publicity stunt – Dickenson is a qualified commercial pilot and regularly flies for charter airline Astraeus. The heavy metal star made a special request to fly the Glasgow […]

AC Milan’s new signing Ronaldo made his debut in front of a half-empty San Siro yesterday. The man we quite cruelly dubbed Rotundo during last summer’s World Cup came close to scoring against Livorno in his brand spanking new number 99 shirt. The shirt is available to buy complete with Ronny’s name and number from […]

Former Manchester United winger and all round twinkle toes Andrei Kanchelskis has decided to retire from football. Kanchelskis, now 38-years-old, said: "You need to leave at the right time. Now seems a suitable moment to begin a new chapter in my footballing life," added Kanchelskis, who will be deciding his plans in the coming weeks. […]

Bayern Munich‘s Olympiastadion was, and is, one of my favourite stadiums. It featured a striking design that had a glass roof which looked like some kind of futuristic spider’s web. Well, with Bayern moving to a new ground, they were already having to come up with something far more impressive. What they ended up with […]

Now, this is sneaky. The government have spotted that our beloved English national side is so lacklustre that the only chance we’ll have of qualifying in the future is if we get through automatically as hosts. The English FA has yet to announce that it is going to bid for hosting the 2018 World Cup. […]

Northern Ireland could play their home fixtures in England or Scotland from now on unless the government agrees to repair the roof of Windsor Park. Although a Euro 2008 qualifier against Sweden will go ahead as planned, the Irish FA has been told that the necessary safety certificate will not be issued beyond that unless […]