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Who ate all the pies

Dip in to scour the latest Deadline Day titbits...

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Lookalikes

Shit Lookalikes: Does exactly what it says on the tin. As far as we’re concerned, when it comes to footballing lookalikes; the shitter the better!

Is Michael Clarke Duncan, star of The Green Mile, how Heskey would look if he ever broke out a smile?

This is a little scary! This appears to be Chelsea legend Gianfranco Zola starring in the video to Bonnie Tyler’s Total Eclipse of the Heart (click here if you want to put yourself through the entire video). What’s the Italian for Turn around, Bright Eyes?!

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Arsenal would probably do better to shove Flea in goal right now, given Mad Jens’s shocking start to the season – Manuel Almunia played in goal for Arsenal against Sparta Prague last night, with Jens sulking at home in Germany, supposedly injured.

Our latest Shit Lookalike comes courtesy of Pies reader Daniel Budden. He quite rightly pointed out that Arsenal’s man from Minsk, Alexander Hleb, is a dead ringer for a young Kevin Bacon, which is a coincidence because he also saved Arsene Wenger’s bacon against Fulham a couple of weeks back.
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Who is this slim hunk of a man? Surely not Big Martin Jol, before he got big? Yes, it’s true.

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Thanks to Pies reader Leean Pindar, who spotted this glaring error in last weekend’s Sunday Times Style supplement.

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Rodders may have been an East End wideboy, but West Ham’s Mark Noble is an East End central midfielder.

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It’s a protracted transfer from Sevilla to Chelsea Jim, but not was we know it. Or something like that. Many thanks to Carey Roberts for the heads-up. Keep those lookalikes comin’…

Thanks to Pies reader Dave Sparks for notifying us of the glaring similarities between Portsmouth boss Harry Redknapp and the Lion from The Wizard of Oz. The pair have similar wigs and identical droopy cheeks. I always get the characters mixed up. If I recall correctly, the Tin Man was looking for a heart and the Scarecrow wanted a brain. I think the Lion was after a bung as part of Dorothy’s controversial move to Emerald City.
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One’s a Bulgarian winger that plays for Aston Villa and the other is an 80s American teen film star – but both share a fondness for big hair and highlights

Shamon motherf*cker! Remember when Michael Jackson was still black and had most of his own facial features?

Yet another of Pies’ hugely popular barrel-scraping doppelgangers series, Shit Lookalikes, for your viewing pleasure. Fulham’s Anglo-Ecuadorian-Northern Irish manager Lawrie Sanchez and his new specs are a dead ringer for Anglo-Chinese Channel 4 presenter Gok Wan, star of the WAG must-watch How To Look Good Naked.
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Maybe not at first glance but next time take a look at ITV sports presenter, Jim Rosenthal, and you’ll see he bears an odd resemblance to Sesame Street’s number loving vampire – Ah, Ah, Ah

Following our feature on footballers who rap, perhaps we should next consider footballers who look like rappers. First we showed you that El Hadji Diouf is Pharrell Williams. Now we can conclusively proove that Spurs and England midfielder Jermaine Jenas is a passable double for US hip hop star Rich Boy. Nuff respec’ to Pies reader Craig for spotting this one.
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Chelsea%20new%20away.jpgApparently Chelsea’s new fluorescent away kit is supposed to give them some sort of edge on the pitch, although Pies would have to question the logic of having Jose Mourinho’s tactics printed on the kit for opposition managers and players to see.

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A big shout-out to Pies reader Mark Sharon for spotting that Kieran Richardson looks rather similar to Micah (played by Noah Gray-Cabey, a ten-year-old classically trained pianist), a character in new hit TV show ‘Heroes’. I haven’t yet seen Heroes, but friends tell me it’s rather good – unlike Kieran, who is rather shit.

Fatter%20Frank.JPGWell, whad’ya know? It turns out Fat Frank Lampard is actually carrying a few less pounds know than we he was a kid! This is one of a selection of photos in this excellent gallery of footballers when they were young.

A bit obscure unless you’re into comic book adaptations like Blade 2 or Hell Boy. Both films featured the Holllywood actor, Ron Perlman, but if he can’t make the next sequel then we’re sure former US and Blackburn goalkeeper, Brad Friedel, would be the perfect substitute

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Without doubt the shittest lookalike I’ve ever posted, but it is a rather amusing pic – so sue me. It was taken during a visit by the Man Utd squad to Chimelong Safari Park in Guangzhuo, China.

In the same way that overweight comedian Peter Kay looks like John O’Shea we think that another out of condition comic and 8 Out of Ten Cats presenter, Jason Manford, looks like a larger than life Michael Owen.

Dan%20Petrescu%20t-shirt.jpgOne thing Pies loves about RetroFootballTshirts’ range is that you will often come across a shirt in honour of a player who doesn’t tend to cross your mind very often. And you can’t beat a bit of nostalgia! One such player is Dan Petrescu.

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Thanks to Pies reader Doug Myers, who has taken advantage of our new Facebook group to suggest this outstanding Shit Lookalike. Carlos Tevez – despite being a dead ringer for Red Hot Chilli Peppers frontman Anthony Kiedis – is also the spitting image of Blanca from the video game Street Fighter. That is uncanny!
Oh, and if anyone has a clue whether this should be in the West Ham or Man United category, let us know!

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As the Sun might say, what a pair of egg-headed Swedes! Interesting that Ljungberg was snapped with the chairman at his unveiling, rather than the manager – is this a signing that Alan Curbishley didn’t sanction or want, perhaps? (Ie. one of those Abramovich/Shevchenko things).

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Next up off the Pies Shit Lookalike conveyer belt is England and Chelsea guvnor John Terry and actor Matthew Macfadyen, who is best known for starring in BBC spy drama Spooks.