Top Ten Oscar-Worthy Footballers (Videos)
By Chris Wright
We know we’re a little ‘late to the party’ with this one but, in celebration of the 83rd Academy Awards which were held in Los Angeles on Sunday night, here are Pies’ top ten nominations for ‘Best Footballing Actor in a Simulated Role’…
10. Kader Keita – Brazil vs Ivory Coast, 2010:
The rib bone’s connected to the face bone…
9. Oleksandr Aliyev – Arsenal vs Dynamo Kyiv, 2008:
Russian midfielder takes ‘playing possum’ to new heights…
8. Steven Taylor – Newcastle vs Aston Villa, 2005:
When the old ‘clutching the imaginary exit wound’ routines fails to fool anyone…
7. Emerson Acuna – Atletico Junior vs America, 2008:
‘Simulation incroyable’ indeed…
6. Steven Gerrard – Liverpool vs Bolton, 2006:
Stevie G MBE has a fair old back-catalogue to file through as this video will duly attest to, but his leg-buckling wilt against Bolton (1:30) just about stands out from the rest of his oeuvre…
5. Jens Lehmann – Arsenal vs Bolton, 2006:
Mad Jens at the peak of his powers…
4. Sergio Busquets – Barcelona vs Inter Milan, 2010:
Peek-a-boo…
3. Jurgen Klinsmann – Germany vs Argentina, 1990:
Many of today’s aspirant footballing hams consider this appalling effort to be genesis as far as the relatively modern practice of ‘spine-arching’ is concerned…
2. Rivaldo – Brazil vs Turkey, 2002:
Rivaldo found himself fined £5,180 by FIFA for this peerless piece of ‘method’, though the Brazilian playmaker didn’t seem overly phased – assuring reporters that he ‘wasn’t sorry about anything’…
1. Alberto Gilardino – Celtic vs AC Milan, 2007:
Utterly pathetic, but in a truly truly astounding way…
That’s right, no Didier Drogba…deal with it.
Missed any pearlers? Give us a nudge in the comments box below…

















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That Gilardino dive gets more preposterous with every watch. We chose Bryan Carrasco slapping himself in the face with someone else’s hand as Best Actor award in our Oscars 2010/11. http://blog.tikabooson.com/?p=983
Er… all very good entries, but what about Morten Gamst Pederson for Blackburn against Arsenal. THE best dive ever.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0I8p_CRR3Bk
Great article.
Dida? falling to ground 5 minutes after a “slap” !?
@Babo: Dammit, I completely forgot about MGP’s sly glance! Definitely worthy of an award.
No Cristiano Ronaldo AT ALL?!! Or Leo Messi’s getting Chelsea’s Asier Del Horno sent off in a CL match, complete with a peek at the ref almost as sublime as Busquets’.
One can only hope the ref in no. 7 was never allowed to set foot on a football pitch again after that.
It was absolutely hilarious when Fantasy Football League did the Klinsmann ‘Phoenix From The Flames’. Hasn’t been uploaded to Youtube yet, though :(
Have to make do with the Ilunga Mwepu one in the meantime.
Lehman vs Drogba is a favourite of mine
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyA_MB9l-b4
@Santi: It was a toss-up which one made it into the final 10, but the split-second look of sheer disbelief when he realises he hasn’t got the free-kick vs Bolton eventually pipped the epic fued with Droggers.
Don’t forget good old bundesliga: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aPHJxV1-2o
You should come and watch carefully the portuguese league for only one weekend and I’m sure you’ll get some serious contenders… :(
@tikabooson
Carrasco’s move was not a fake one, he REALLY slapped himself! Method actor? If that’s the case, ok, yes, he’s the winner…
I think the sub Steven Taylor was on the line…
So glad to see Gerrard in here, to all the pool fans that preach about Ronaldo your captain fantastic is an advocate of diving. They should throw in a two-footed challenge compilation while they’re at it.
That Klinsmann one was a bit unfair. He had a few other dives more suited to this article me thinks.
In this particular one the argentinian hits him just bellow the knee with his studs, although the spine srchery afterward was funny as hell.
I believe this has already been said, but DIDA vs. Celtic?
Dida!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZviLX37sMY
Saarbrücken’s Marc Lerandy gets brutally hit by Offenbach’s Olivier Occean (3rd German league):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub4QY82KBAg
;)
you’ve missed a few of my favourites, it’s understandable as there are so many to choose from!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uxydvtu9UsM Torres dive
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=meWyEBCo6oo De Rossi dive
there was also that Rangers player that took a dive after squaring up to another player as if he got head butted, can’t find a link to it though.
You Should See All The Players From America FC In Mexico In Every Game They Fake A Foul Or Penalty
There is no number 3.
And why the hell did you include Klinsmann? Monzon goes for him studs up legs stretched with absolutely no intention of getting the ball. If Klinsmann hadn’t done what he did his legs could have broken straight off.
Fabregas kick yourself
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fZMuS4ynSog
Dida is missing
To be honest the Gerrard video shows mainly fouls on him though I won’t deny some of them are blatant dives. Arjen Robben againt Reina anyone?
how the hell is there no ronaldo in this?
Big lack of Kyle Lafferty in this article! Cheating lowlife!
Aliyev is Ukrainian.
gerrard is a best of all divers really disgrace. @alan smit wash you eyes you idiot pathetic lpool fan . everybody knows gerrards diver
No CR7?? I’m almost disappointed
Rivaldo’s is the most laughable.
Hard to choose though