Football GIF: Gareth Bale Hits Abnormally Strong Gravity Hotspot vs Liverpool
By Chris Wright
In which the majestic, graceful, honest and British Gareth Bale is unfortunate enough to run headlong through a hotspot of intensely strong gravity caused by solar flares reflecting off the twin moons of Tatooine at Anfield on Monday night.
Poor Gareth…
It may well have looked like a pathetic dive to those too ignorant to spot the atmospheric disturbance, but I can assure you that honest, British players like Gareth would never stoop so low as to associate with such a devious practice – not like Luis Suarez, of whom it should be expected. He is a horrible foreign oik after all.
Bale, as I mentioned previously, is British.
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Poor bloke, I hope he’s alright.
rooney’s the cleanest player in the game
@Leo until this Saturday when he gets sent off against Liverpool.
Its nice to see the new generation like Bale and Johnson are following the path of Lampard, fat bastard Rooney and Gerrard.
And they too will benefit from the xenophobic press protecting them to keep the meme that only dirty foreigners dive.
Remember that campaign about stopping diving? One token foreign guy and that was it (funny that the italians couldnt find one of their own to punish so they went the token foreigner route).
Bale is ready for the Barca dolphin academy and he even got a beauty last year against Real.
Luis told me its a difficult skill, british players don’t pick it up that quick. Of course he hasn’t seen me in action .. hehe .. but I am not going to tell him that. I want him to be happy.
As much as diving and cheating pisses me off, This article did make me laugh! Maybe I’m the one in the wrong and didnt realise how many gravity hotspots there are at premier league grounds ;)
I can categorically state that I have never seen a Scottish footballer no matter what league they play in diving, ever. Is it a genetic thing or down to the deep fried food?
@ rev tim lovejoy, it’s not the diving that gets me annoyed about foreigners its the fact they’re dirty as you mentioned above, British on the other hand are a very clean people.
@JT: It’s becoming a real problem.
Yet the FA and FIFA will clamp down on something else next season which will encourage more cards and more diving.
Excellent article Chris! Best use of sarcasm I’ve seen in a while.
I think it’s the weight of his chin dragging him down. Is this the same as IF Murray wins a Grand Slam he’ll be BRITISH ! but if he goes out 1st round he’s that miserable Scottish b*stard ! The FA must be diggin up all sorts of birth certs to see if they could swing a wee – “Bale d’you fancy jumpin the border me old son” ! Now that Arry’s free to take the reigns
he’s Welsh, you prick.
made me sick to see a spurs player doing this.
i follow MLS, and believe it or not they make a bigger deal about it in north america than england. i guess they’re trying to nip it in the bud. i recall one instance where two separate players were both awarded set pieces (a FK leading to a skyball and a PK), their website MLSsoccer had an article up two days later talking about how blatant the dives were but mentioning that with the games fast pace the refs should’ve consulted their linesmen.
i used to clean rooney using clorex, sure clean and white. but 3 match banin euro, sad….
Oh, dear, Sam… Sam, Sam, Sam. Amazing.
@ wowza, what the hell is a skyball?
You know England borders Wales as well SAM – ya GONK !
So are all the Kopites who were saying things like “piesisracistsuarezobviouslydidn’tmeanitbecauseBaleisacheatertoo” happy now?
@ Al, Here’s Kris Boyd taking a tumble
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3r7vzo4R3YE
Finally someone with sense !
Just classic English attitude to take any Welsh/Scottish/N.I. success and try and turn it into their own
You’re all wrong. It was the cat that put him off. Brilliant stratedy by Kenny Dalglish of course.