Quote of the day: Michael Owen could have been as good as Fernando Torres and Cristiano Ronaldo

Ollie Irish

15th, June 2009


michael_owen.jpg“Were it not for an unhappy spell at Real Madrid and two injury-scarred years at Newcastle, he would be spoken about in the same breath as Torres and Ronaldo and valued in the priceless figures that only match-winning goalscorers ever justify.”
This is perhaps the best quote from a 30-page begging letter brochure, produced by the Wasserman Media Group (which represents Michael Owen) to tell clubs why they should take a chance on Newcastle United’s injury prone striker. Owen’s Newcastle contract expires at the end of this month, leaving him free to pick a club. Unfortunately for Owen, his appeal is not what it was.

WMG produced the glossy brochure to help convince the likes of Everton, Aston Villa, West Ham and Man City – all of whom have expressed an interest in signing Owen – that Owen is actually a thoroughbred in the same class as Senor Torres and Senor C-Ron, and not, as some people suspect, a past-it crock.
Has it come to this? Poor Little Michael.
It’s all to easy to shoot a fish this big in a such a small barrel, but I do have some sympathy with Owen. After starting his career on such a high, it’s been sad to see his career wrecked by injuries. We all know even a fit Owen isn’t in the same class as men like Torres and Ronaldo, but who knows what he might have achieved had he remained injury free.
Many thanks to David Allison for the tip.
Sh*t Lookalikes: Michael Owen and Jason Manford

Posted in Newcastle Utd, Transfers & Rumours

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  1. jeneria says:

    Owen’s pace was what made him so
    great in his early years. It was such fun
    to watch Owen and Fowler slice and dice
    and zip back in the day. He has lost that
    pace and without it, he doesn’t offer much
    except he still has a killer’s finishing
    ability, no doubt about that. Even slow
    and injured and half cyborg, I have seen
    Owen finish with a precision that not
    many strikers have.
    What is going to hurt Owen this go around
    is that he probably isn’t willing to take
    a salary cut or be a squad player. Either
    move would make him much more
    attractive to a team.

  2. Jon Crowder says:

    Owen without his pace is like a porn star allergic to viagra and unable to get an erection. Useless. He doesnt even finish with a plomb anymore. One word to describe him. Finished.

  3. Louwrens says:

    I have another word: desperate

  4. george says:

    Owen had a better goals per shots ratio last season than any other player in the premier league. Torres only scored about 5 more goals than him and that was in a team going for the title.Owens job is to score goals and for the whole of his career he has not failed to do so on a consistant basis.

  5. jeneria says:

    I agree with you. There are few who can
    finish as well as Owen. He just lacks the
    speed to make the cuts to get the space
    but when a ball is sent to him–he’s
    going to score more often than not.

  6. kalasoma says:

    There’s always Galatasaray…

  7. Jon Crowder says:

    Anyone who thinks Owen will score a lot of premier league goals again should start taking there medz again.

  8. danceposa says:

    Dont get me started on Michael! What an a** hole

  9. danceposa says:

    Its hysterical. God he thinks hes good doesnt he?
    What a no mark!! if he was that gud then Managers wud be rushing to buy him! I know women who can run faster with the ball and kick with the other foot better than him

  10. danceposa says:

    Sorry I meant kick the ball better with either foot!!!

  11. danceposa says:

    this is a begging letter to the “Michael” supporters.
    Please present ALL HIS STATS.
    1 How many blanks in premiership games
    2 How many run outs in the reserves
    3 How many times did he score the non winning goals ie the third and fourth in a rout
    4 how many blanks and then a brace or a hat trick to boost his average.
    I have them in my head TOOOOOOOOO MANY!!!!!!
    Overrated and over the hill

  12. danceposa says:

    I kicked Owen when he was up and protested from the word go. I remember vividly a conversation I had with Chris LAwler (sorry to name drop ) after the wonder goal against Argentina. I said I thought he was a one trick pony then and so he has remained all his footy career. He never hit it off with Fowler and Houlier was determined that if anyone wa going to be the star it was “Michael” he wasnt fit to polish Robbies boots. Robbie had more talent in any limb you care to mention than Owen. WHat a shame Robbie got injured. NOW HIS STATS DO HOLD UP TO SCRUTINY!!!!!!!!!!

  13. george says:

    I could not find all Owens stats but I try answering a few.
    /How many blanks in premiership games.
    This means nothing.Every striker does not score in every game, Look at these stats for Ronaldo with Manchester united,
    196 matches, 84 goals. That means that you could say he must have played at least 112 matches in which he did not score.Plus if you do what you said and take away a brace in some matches it could be more.
    And just while were on it, Owen played 286 matches, 144 goals. Plus as he gets injured a lot, a lot of these appearences were probably coming of the bench for the last few minutes.
    /How many run outs in the reserves
    I dont think he has played a lot in reserves, maybe If he has been coming back from a injury but I think all of his career he has been pretty much a first team player
    /How many times did he score the non winning goals ie the third and fourth in a rout.
    Again I cant find the stats yet for all the matches but as he was the main striker for liverpool, Newcastle and England, Most of the time he was the first person to score or score the winning goal.Only when he was at Madrid would I agree with you as a lot of the time when he came on they were already winning by 1 or 2. But anyway If At the end of a season two teams have equal points it comes down to goal difference so every goal counts as a important goal.
    Owen to me is a excellent striker.I am not saying he is better than other players in all round game play but when it comes to doing what he is ment to do, score goals I rate him very high.I dont understand why people complain about a striker that can only score goals, I mean whats next complaining about goal keepers that cant score.

  14. jon crowder says:

    George, George, George. What you should be saying is that you used to rate him highly. He used to score goals yes and he was fast (a long time ago). My point is he’s finished as a top striker. I dont think he could even cut it in the huff and puff of the championship.
    One other point to make on MO. Is he a multi-millionaire? You know and I know the answer is yes. If he was so determined to prove people wrong. He should be willing to play on a menial contract.
    I have yet to find a bookies that will give me odds on MO not scoring more than 20 prem goals in a season.
    Oh and danceposa you must have been very bored to come on and say all those things. 5 times you posted. Wasnt Doctors and Nurses on TV ?

  15. george says:

    I bet owen will score 20 goals now

  16. cjrulezhard says:

    Hey George, I’ll take a piece of that action.

  17. […] Who know’s perhaps it was just that bloody brochure? […]

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