Crystal Palace: Misfiring Striker Alexander Sørloth Sends Letter Thanking Fan For Captaining Him In Fantasy Football

Alan Duffy

18th, December 2018

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Crystal Palace have struggled in front of goal this season, with back-up striker Alexander Sorloth failing to find the back of the net in the Premier League this season.

However, for Fantasy Football player, Jonas Antonsen, the Norwegian striker is worthy of the captaincy in his virtual first 11.

Ex-FC Midtjylland forward Sorloth was so chuffed by the faith Antonsen has put in him that he wrote to him, thanking him for the honour and promising him a discount on the popcorn sold at Selhurst Park.

Here’s the translation…

Dear Jonas,

It is with great pride and joy I am writing you this letter today. I have been informed by reliable sources that I am the captain, and first choice striker on your fantasy team.

I know I don’t score goals, or produce many assists or get to come on much at all. Therefore it is with great pleasure I register that people still believe in me those 15 times I have been on the pitch this year.

You and all my biggest fans, mom and dad, are my inspiration in continuing my perfomances for Crystal Palace and the Norwegian national team. You are the ones I think of when I’m on the pitch for five minutes in every other match. I don’t think to much about my playing time. And since I don’t get too much time on the ball I don’t need to think about it either. Therefore I can just wander around on the pitch, look up to the stands, and wonder if you’re in the stands cheering me on.

Jonas. I hope you will come and see me warm up sometime during the season. I’ll talk to Hodgson and see to that I’ll be running up and down the sideline for a long time so that you can see me in action when you come to London.

I can’t get you free tickets. Only the best lads get. But I’ve talked to Edna at the «Popcorn-corner», and she’ll give you a 15 % discount on a bucket of popcorn.

Send me a message on Facebook if you’re travelling to England.

Your friend, captain, and striker.

Alexander Sørloth

All quite sweet, isn’t it. As long as it’s actually true, which we’re not 100% convinced about!

As for the misfiring Sorloth himself, one imagines he’ll get even less playing time in the new year if his manager, Roy Hodgson, goes shopping for that much-needed potent striker.

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