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Nigerian Prostitutes Promise ‘Week Of Free Nookie’ If Nigeria Win AfCoN

By Chris Wright

“Free sex lads! Fill yer boots!”

The Association of Nigerian Prostitutes have promised to give away “a week of free sex” should the Nigerian national side go on to win the Africa Cup of Nations after ousting tournament favourites Ivory Coast in the quarter-finals on Sunday.

The Super Eagles (or should that be ‘The Spread Eagles’?) now face Mali in the semi-finals and the ANP are doing their bit to keep the players’ peckers up, with secretary Jessica Elvis issuing the following statement:

“We want to congratulate the Nigerian national team, the Super Eagles, for qualifying for the next round of the competition.

“To show our support for the national team, we’ll be declaring one week of free sex if the Super Eagles can win the trophy.”

It’s as yet unclear whether it will be the players alone who are offered the week of gratis nookie or if everyone in the country will be able to cash in as, sadly, Pies’ haven’t got round to perusing the small print yet.

On a side note, isn’t it funny how stories about prostitution always start cropping up when major international tournaments roll around? It’s as if journalists have one-track minds or something.

(Via Dirty Tackle)

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By Chris on February 5th, 2013 in International football, Newsnow. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

6 Responses to “Nigerian Prostitutes Promise ‘Week Of Free Nookie’ If Nigeria Win AfCoN”

  1. Sjakie Meulemans says:

    Dear Lord, let them hand out free condoms as well.

  2. porcelain sandwich says:

    Well I was going to support Mali, but I feel that the Nigerians need it more now. Come on you Super Eagles!

  3. wayne says:

    Zambian hoes did the sane thing last tournament haha

  4. Jarren says:

    @Sjakie Meulemans My first thought too.

    I really hope it’s just for the players, and not a nationwide free-for-all.

  5. I am afraid to hear the news from ANP about Nigeria prostitutes free sex offer if the supereagles win. I will advice ANP that it will be meaningful if the prostitutes absteine sex till they get married even if the team will lose the trophy.

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