Juande Ramos has slapped a Â£30m pricetag on Dimitar Berbatov‘s head. Or, to be precise, the Spurs boss has said that ‘a club would have to break the British transfer record to sign Berbatov’. That means Chelsea or Man Utd (the only two English clubs who would buy the Bulgarian) would have to spend more than the reputed Â£30.8m that Chelsea spent on Andriy Shevchenko in 2006.
Fwank Lampard has pledged to spend the rest of his playing career at Chelsea. (In other words, no other big club is interested in him, so he’s played the loyalty card â€“ one of the oldest tricks in the book.) So there will be no dream move to Barcelona for Lamps and his Spanish missus Elen Rives.
Anelka is the main man at Bolton, the star attraction, their best player. Bolton are ‘Nicolas Anelka’s Bolton’, just as Arsenal were ‘Thierry Henry’s Arsenal’ not so long ago. He is happy at the Reebok, but he should be â€“ it’s the sort of club that fits neatly with his selfish, ‘big fish in a small pond’ attitude.
Thanks to Pies reader Vijayan for this fine spot.
The January transfer window is open for business, and so football’s rumour mill has gone into overdrive. Will Berbatov stay at Spurs? Has Joey Barton taken a shower yet? So many questions, so few answers. Here are the top 5 transfer window rumours of the day, neatly summarised in one cut-out-and-keep package:
1 Avram Grant wants to splash out Â£35m to sign both Nicolas Anelka and ‘want-away’ Dimitar Berbatov. Via Daily Star
Peter Crouch’s sending-off was the turning point. The decision was correct: it’s clear from the clip that Crouch suddenly saw red and had no intention of going for the ball. He wanted to clatter Mikel â€“ wouldn’t you? â€“Â and did. And not like Frank Lampard to get a deflected goal, is it?
Not a classic encounter by any means; however, it was fascinating stuff between two teams who clearly hate each other. Here are three things I learned from the match: No.1 Making William Gallas captain was one of Arsene Wenger’s unlikeliest masterstrokes. Gallas strikes me as vain, petulant and arrogant – but give him a bit […]
Chelsea had their Christmas party last night, and as is often the way, it was a fancy-dress affair. John Terry went dressed in an Incredibles superhero outfit, Frank Lampard was kitted out like a 19th century French dandy and Claudio Pizarro looked rather convincing as a Roman Emperor (see pics from the party at the Daily Mail’s website).
No.1 Claudio Pizarro (pictured) is not a world-class striker. He’s more a Derby County-class striker. He could have had a hat-trick but missed several good chances that team-mate Didier Drogba â€“ who is a world-class striker â€“ would surely have put away. Chelsea should ditch Pizarro in the Jan. transfer window.
No.2 Valencia are seriously shit.
Marseille 1-2 Liverpool I agree with Alan Hansen that Liverpool will sneak the win they need to qualify for the next stage.
Chelesa win Group B with this mightily impressive away victory. Many experts thought there could be a shock on the cards in Norway, but that never looked like happening, as Avram Grant’s team cruised to a 4-0 win.
No.1 What was up with Rosenborg? Most of their players started as if they had been on the lash the night before. The league season is now over in Norway, so perhaps that had something to do with the fact that Rosenborg were so jaded and lacking in sharpness.
Whoâ€™s the best and who should be left back in the changing room?
There were some great goals scored at the weekend â€“ Fernando Torres touch of class from the sub’s bench and Ronaldo’s finish from an exquisite Tevez pass come to mind â€“ but we’re suckers for an overhead kick.
Nike’s Put It Where You Want It bandwagon has rolled on a long way since we showed you Wayne Rooney defacing a camera with his marker pen back in July. The latest stop for TV daredevils Dirty Sanchez on the Put It Where You Want tour is paying a visit to Chelsea and France winger Florent Malouda.
Both of these mercenary strikers have been making unsubtle noises about leaving their respective clubs when the going got tough.
1. Despite all the claims of a new brand of football, Avram Grant can do a good Jose Mourinho impression when he wants
2. Chelseaâ€™s fluorescent yellow away kit was the brightest move they made last night
Chelsea avoided defeat by the skin of the postâ€™s paintwork as they weathered a storm of Schalke attacks last night, although they still only need one win from two to qualify.
Schalke v Chelsea, Tues 6 November (ko 7.45pm BST)
Prediction Schalke 0-2 Chelsea
I used to think Ashley was such a nice boy when he was making his way at Arsenal – the sort of polite young man you could take to meet your parents. Then, something happened to him. He went over to the Dark Side, for what reason I don’t know exactly. It all started with […]
The sports minister, Gerry Sutcliffe, has branded John Terry’s salary ‘obscene’. Sutcliffe also attacked Chelski’s general attitude to cash. He said: ‘Good luck to John Terry but I think it is obscene to be on Â£150,000 a week,’ said Sutcliffe. ‘People in the street cannot understand salaries like that. Chelsea are Â£250m in the red […]
When was the last time Steven Gerrard scored a hat-trick? Exactly. Three goals by Captain Lamps and one from Andriy Shevchenko (a fine finish too) were enough â€“ just â€“ to see off a spirited Leicester side in what was a cracking, see-saw match. Chelsea did look shit at the back though, although they are […]
Itâ€™s been quite a year for Gareth Barry, heâ€™s gone from international occasional to Englandâ€™s most consistent performer and now there are rumours that Chelsea are preparing a Â£15m bid to bring him to the Bridge.
HEROES Rob Green Saved a last-gasp penalty (pictured) to snatch a point for West Ham at Pompey. Surely Green now has to be taken seriously for England’s No.1 shirt instead of Paul Robinson? Cesc Fabregas Showed off the full extent of his freakish maturity and talent with a wonderfully authoritative performance at Anfield. Stevie G […]
It seems theyâ€™ve tried everything but bionic body parts to try and restore Andriy Shevchenko to his former glory at Stamford Bridge â€“ including enlisting the help of former athlete, Darren Campbell, to remind him how to run.